


How Did It Come To This?

by originofabsolution



Category: Take That (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College, Alternate Universe - High School, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-13
Updated: 2017-01-02
Packaged: 2018-07-14 21:16:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 41
Words: 30,300
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7190729
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/originofabsolution/pseuds/originofabsolution
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Howard moves from his small town, to Manchester. He meets an interesting group of people he immediately can call his friends. But one of these friends has a passion for dance, music and is a literal angel...<br/>(Donage fic, but with hints of Barlowen + others)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

I was never really sure why my parents decided to pull me out of my previous college in Lancashire and move to Manchester. They pretty much came into my room one day, told me to pack my bags and the next day we left without explanation. I trust that we have moved for a good reason, it’s not like I had anyone to miss or say goodbye to in my previous hometown.

I’ve seen Manchester on tv, it always looked pretty cool. Not as amazing as London, but near enough I guess. We have moved into a small house, in one of the housing estates not too far away from the city centre. I have to share a room with my older brothers, Colin and Michael. My younger sister Samantha and brother Glenn have a room each (lucky.) My mum and stepdad also have a room. So I suppose our house is a little larger than I would have expected, with 4 bedrooms and a considerably large garden.

I have yet to see what my new school/ college will be like. The place teaches ages 14-25, which is different to what I'm used to. It’s my first day at one of the local upper schools. My school jumper doesn’t fit me properly, but I doubt I will be wearing it much anyway.

“Have a great day Howard! Don’t forget to pay attention and make friends!” My mum shouts from the car window as she drives off, leaving me on the curb, at the back of the school. I look around, hoping that no one heard my mum’s embarrassing words.

 

**(This is the era which I am setting this fic in, sorta their late teens/ high school/ college age. But in the present day.)**

 


	2. Chapter 2

I easily find the reception and the nice lady at the desk hands me my timetable and escorts me to my form room. Thankfully no one is bothered with a new person entering the room, as they are all seated in their friendship groups, gossiping and sharing funny stories. I am introduced to my form teacher who is a friendly young man, I suppose as a last resort, he could be my sort of friend.

“Mark!” The teacher shouts across the room. Everyone continues with their conversations, but a small boy, whose head shoots up and sends a questioning look over to us. He then realises that I am new and skips over to us.

“Heya! I’m Mark!” He says happily and sticks out his hand for me to shake. I shake it.

“I’m Howard.” I nod, returning his contagious smile. 

“So, Howard. Where have you come from? Wait don’t tell me. Liverpool? York?-” Mark begins to reel off loads of towns and cities. Really trying to figure it out. I turn to look at the form teacher and I notice him smiling and shaking his head at Mark’s friendly nature, before patting me on the back and walking off.

“North Lancashire.” I smirk at Mark.

“I was nearly there! Come with me, meet my friends.” He grabs my wrist and pulls me over to the table where he was sitting before.

“Guys this is Howard.” he motions to me and pushes me down onto a chair. “Howard, this is Gary and Robbie.” he motions to the two boys sitting on the opposite side of the table.

“How’s it going Howard.” Robbie nods his head and Gary does the same.

We merge into a comfortable conversation, them asking me about myself and telling me about themselves. I immediately found out the main interests in the three of them. Gary: food. Robbie: girls. Mark: fashion. I’m surprised how easily I fit into this small group already.

“So what lessons have you got there, mate?” Gary asks. I hand over my timetable to him and the other two crowd over it. 

“You have nearly all your lessons with us! What a coincidence! Just seems like you are more clever than us at maths.” Robbie exclaims. At least I will have people to show me around and talk to in my lessons.

A bell rings.

Everyone stands up and starts making their way to their first lessons. 

“C’mon Howard. You ready for a little bit of Romeo and Juliet?” Gary asks and leads me out of the room. I’m assuming we have english.

I was right. We observed a hour and a half performance from the drama group, of Romeo and Juliet. It was hilarious, most of them couldn’t even act, or sing, or dance for that matter. Overall I think the four of us felt like taking over and doing it ourselves. 


	3. Chapter 3

Next was break and then 2 hours of P.E before lunch. I have to say, I am enjoying today more than all my years at my previous school. I think it may be due to my 3 new friends, making me laugh constantly and making me feel wanted.

“I hate Mondays.” Gary mutters from beside me in the changing room, as we change into our sports kit.

“Why’s that?” I ask, tying up my shoe laces.

“Two hours of constant exercise. I’d rather sit on my arse, watch netflix and eat cake.” He explains, leaning against the wall, waiting for me to finish.

“So netflix and chill?” I ask with a smirk. He rolls his eyes at me.

“Yes, but just without the chill.” he admits. Robbie swings around the corner suddenly.

“If you had your way, you would totally chill with the cake. Now hurry up!” He says.

“It’s not my fault. Howards taking years!” Gary counters.

“He’s new, he gets no blame for anything this week.” Robbie smirks.

“You suck.” Gary frowns and looks away from Rob.

“No, my dear friend. You do.” Robbie laughs.

“Fuck off.” Gary laughs suddenly “Now let’s go!” he runs off after Robbie.

“Are they always like this?” I ask Mark, still laughing at their previous conversation. Mark nods.

“Yup, pretty much.” He smiles.


	4. Chapter 4

An hour and a half later, Gary has collapsed onto the grass and refuses to get up. Me and Robbie are nearing the end of 3 laps around the track, in a race to see who’s fitter. They all were quite surprised to see how athletically capable I am.

Rob has been a couple of meters ahead throughout the whole race. But I plan to unleash my speed at the very end.

I can see as we enter the final bend before the straight, that Robbie knows he has pushed himself too far, and I easily sprint past him with a massive smirk on my face.

“HOWARD WINS! ROB YOU REALLY DO SUCK!” Mark exclaims as I pass the finish line. Once Rob crosses the finish line, he jabs his friend in the side.

“This isn’t over. I am the fittest!” Robbie exclaims dramatically.

“You’re done Rob. Cake is your only friend now.” Gary says from where he sunbathes on the floor.

“Oh, Gaz. How you underestimate me. My revenge will be painful.” Robbie casually sits on Gary’s stomach. “Now… how about… BUNDLES!!!” he shouts and holds Gary down to the floor. Mark flings himself on top of Robbie. 

“C’mon Howard!” He shouts. I smile excitedly and pile on top of the other three. Gary lets out a high pitched scream and we all laugh madly.


	5. Chapter 5

“I saw that there was a dance squad on the school website. Do you think I could join it?” I ask my friends in the changing rooms after p.e is over. They all look at each other. 

“I don't think the dance squad would be best for you. They are all show offs and not nice people. But I could take you to see one of the leaders to ask.” Mark says to me. I wonder what is so bad about them? I guess I will just have to find out. 

Once we are back in our uniforms, Mark leads me over to the dance studios. As we near the rooms, which are all empty so far, I hear loud but slow, emotional music. 

“In there. I will wait here for you.” Mark points to the room with the source of music. I nod and hoist my bag onto my shoulder a little higher. I walk into the room to see a tall boy in the middle of the room, dancing along to the music. He is wearing black baggy trousers, some high top shoes and a tight black tank top. As well as a black headband tied around his forehead. His moves are so strong, graceful and precise. And so… moving, to the heartfelt song. 

I just stand in the doorway and watch him until the song is over. 

“How can I help you?” He asks, pausing his playlist. He must have noticed I was there without even looking at me. 

He turns around and takes a couple of steps in my direction, even the way he walks is graceful. Which combines nicely with his soft blue eyes which I couldn't help noticing immediately. 

I take a step forward, before stopping, feeling ashamed at my heavy walking style compared to his.  

“I was wondering if you could tell me about the dance squad.” I say, running my hand through my damp hair. 

“You want to join?” He asks “I'm afraid you will have to try out in the auditions, numbers are limited in the group.”

“Okay. When are the auditions?” I ask. 

“Next week. Are you Howard?” He changes the subject. 

“Um, yeah…” I say nervously, wondering how he knows my name. 

“Is Mark out there?” He asks. I nod and he walks from the room. 

I just stand there in the room, waiting for him to come back. I don't know why, but it feels like I should stay here. So I take a look around the room, observing the various stereos and photos on the wall. I immediately notice the tall boy in a majority of the photos. 

He soon returns into the room with his arm on Mark’s shoulders. 

“Why didn't you come get me, to introduce me to your new friend?” He asks Mark. 

“I know how pissed you get when we interrupt your dancing. So I thought I'd send him in alone.” Mark explains and the boy lets go of him. To go collect his bag and iphone from the docking station. 

“I wasn't pissy at all for some reason.” The boy shoots a quick glance at me. 

“Well you must be special then Howard. This is Jason.” Mark introduces me to him. 


	6. Chapter 6

The three of us leave the room and follow Mark to wherever we will be eating lunch. On our small journey, it seemed like Jason couldn’t walk normally without breaking into some sort of dance. It made me smile for some reason.

“So, Howie. You a good dancer?” He asks me, walking like a normal person for the first time.

“I’d like to think so.” I say, not wanting to seem too full of myself.

“Mark said you beat Rob in a race. So you’re fast. Are you strong too?” He asks, picking a couple of flowers from the passing bushes.

“I guess? How do you want me to prove that?” I question, looking over at him. He is looking at me with a cheeky grin. 

“Carry me on your shoulders till we get to the field.” He suggests. I can’t help grinning. What harm could it do ey?

“Okay, jump on.” I say and his grin grows. Before I can even squat a little, to help him up, he is already getting comfortable on top of my shoulders. I didn’t think it would be possible for someone to jump up onto my shoulders with one smooth move.

“Onwards!” he exclaims, pointing one of his arms in the direction of the field, where I assume we are meeting the others. I hold onto his legs on my chest as I begin to walk in the direction, laughing at how childish this is. But it’s fun! I’m surprised how light he is to carry, does he eat at all? “You’re fun Howard, I like that.” I hear him say after I have finished laughing. I smile.

 

We got some funny looks as I walked to the field with Jason on my shoulders. Together we must have been around 10ft. So it’s not surprising that everyone I walked past, noticed the massive figure blocking the sun.

“The circus has arrived and Jason has pulled again I see!” Rob exclaims as we near them. I hear Jason sigh but then giggle a little at his comment.

“Can I stand on your shoulders?” Jason asks, patting my head.

“Go for it!” I say, a little too excited. Dance partners do stuff like this. Maybe we could be dance partners? 

He pulls up his legs so he can remove his shoes. I let go of them so he can take them off easier. I forget to grab back hold of them and he begins to slip backward off of my shoulders.

“JESUS” I shout and quickly grab his legs again. He has fallen so far that he is upside down with his back pressed against mine. I can hear him laughing like a maniac and the others seem to be doing the same. “Did you do that on purpose?” I ask seriously.

“Yeah!” Jason continues to laugh uncontrollably

“This brings a whole new meaning to ‘having your head up your arse.’” I joke, noticing the back of his head is rested against my butt. The others begin to cry with laughter as Jason pulls himself back onto my shoulders properly as quick as he can.

“Give me your hands.” Jason instructs, seemingly ignoring my previous comment. I don’t know how he reacted, as I cannot see his face. I put my arms in the air and he grabs onto my hands as he stands up on my shoulders. He holds onto me until he is stood up straight. I let go of his hands, and hope he won’t pull another funny stunt where I am meant to catch him. 

I assume he will just jump off of my shoulders and do some type of crowd dive onto his friends. But instead he leaps off of my shoulders and does a front flip, landing in the perfect upright position.

I look over to my new friends, who are holding up small pieces of paper with numbers on them, rating the ‘performance’ as Gary called it.

“That was great, I loved it and it’s a 9 from me!” Gary says. Jay bows.

“Great flip. Fabulous fashion sense today Jay. It’s a 10 from me!” Mark says, Jay bows again.

“Terrible, absolute rubbish! I could do it better with my eyes closed. It’s a -5000 from me!” Robbie says, with a mischievous smirk.

“You little shit! It was perfect!” Jason exclaims and leaps onto Robbie, who smothers his mayonnaise sandwich all over his face. 

“Are they always like this?” I ask Mark for the second time today.

“Yep, pretty much. Literally everyone acts that way around Rob.” Mark explains. 


	7. Chapter 7

I had a couple of conversations with Jason at lunch, but I mainly chatted with Gary and Mark. Because Jay and Rob were busy trying to piss each other off. 

They lead me to our last 2 hour class of the day, music. Something we all share a passion for, Gary told me. 

The teacher filled me in on the project this term, to create a couple of songs which are completely original. For extra points we could add extra pieces, like design for merchandise and stuff. 

Mark immediately asked me if I wanted to join their group. Which I gladly said yes to. We took off to one of the music rooms, stacked with loads of different instruments. My eyes went to the turntables as soon as we entered the room. I had always had a passion for djing and mixing tracks. 

“So, how far have you got with these songs then?” I ask them, playing around with the turntables. 

“We have a few songs, we don't know which ones to scrap or to keep for our performance.” Mark explains, tuning his bass. “We can show you one if you want.” I nod at his proposal. They each get ready with their instruments. Gary on the piano, Mark on the bass, Jason on the guitar and Rob just singing. 

“Wait, you have no one on the drums.” I state the obvious. They all nod. “I could join in on them, once I get the beat of the song.” I suggest and sit behind the kit. 

Gary counts them in. 

“You, you're such a big star to me, you're everything I wanna be-” Mark sings the entire song with the others singing backup, with minimal musical instrument use. Only the piano really. 

“That was really good. But I think you need to include the instruments more.” I suggest. 

“We have another song with a little more of that.” Gary says, jumping onto the keyboard playing the opening chords. Before Mark joins him on the bass. I add a steady beat into the mix and Robbie starts to sing. 

“Spirits move me, everytime I'm near you-” he sings the entire song whilst doing some funny little dances. I notice Jason has put down his guitar and is dancing along to the song, which looks like a practiced routine. 

Both of the songs sound cheesy, but the 1st one ‘Shine’ they called it. Was by far the most cheesiest song I have ever heard. I can now imagine them making a music video and it making the song to a new level of cheesiness.

The song is soon finished and it didn’t sound too bad as the first practice.

“Can I just ask, why was Robbie doing pretty much nothing in ‘Shine’?” I ask the group after giving them some feedback on ‘Could It Be Magic’. The song had quite a nineties vibe to it.

“He bunked off whilst we made the song, so we didn’t bother adding parts for him.” Gary explains.

“That was mean, Gaz, really mean. I was ill.” Rob tries to put on a serious face, which doesn’t cover up the lie in his comeback.

“It was karma Rob. Get used to it.” Mark chuckles.


	8. Chapter 8

Within the next 2 hours we have near enough perfected ‘Shine’ and ‘Could It Be Magic’. Gary also started to introduce some chords to a new song. 

“We should all write and take lead on one song each.” He suggests as we leave the building and walk away from the school. We all nod, though Jason didn’t seem too sure on the idea. 

“Do you wanna all come back to mine? Maybe we could brainstorm ideas for our individual songs.” Mark suggests.

“Nah, I got dance rehearsals in an hour.” Jason says. They all look at him and moan in annoyance.

“C’mon Jay! You know you hate everyone there, they don’t listen to you and they completely take you for granted!” Rob protests, stopping and standing in front of Jason.

“They just kid around, they aren’t bad people.” Jay replies defensively.

“Really? You got a black eye last time and you wouldn’t speak to us for 3 days!” Gaz sides with Robbie. I take in everything I hear from their argument. Sounds like this is why the 3 of them resent the dance squad.

Eventually the 3 of them give up trying to knock some sense into Jay, and walk off.

“How, can you come to my dance rehearsal. So I can prove everything is fine there?” Jason grabs my wrist, before I can follow the others.

“Yeah, of course.” I say with a little smile. I turn to the others “See you guys tomorrow!” I shout to them. They turn and shout a goodbye to me.

“I gotta go home first, but you can tag along before we go to your dance thingy.” I say to Jason, leading him up the street to my house.


	9. Chapter 9

“Mum! I’m back!” I shout once I get in the house. My mum trots down the stairs and hugs me.

“Theres my Howard! How’s your first day been? Did you make any friends?” she asks, before noticing Jason stood behind me. “Who’s this?” She asks curiously.

“My friend Jason. I also have 3 new friends called Gary, Mark and Robbie.” I explain. Her face is one of pure surprise.

“Well. I look forward to meeting them!” she says “Can I get you a drink?” she asks Jay.

“Could I have a cup of tea please?” He asks politely.

“I will go put the kettle on” I smile to my mother, walking to the kitchen. I can hear Jason and my mum talking in the next room. I hope she isn’t telling him anything embarrassing about me. I prepare the tea and a couple of minutes later Samantha joins me in the kitchen.

“Where’s my cup of tea?” she asks sarcastically.

“In the kettle. Make it yourself.” I say bluntly, not wanting to hear my little sister’s whining whilst I am in such a good mood.

“Fine.” She grabs the kettle and pours herself some hot water then puts a tea bag in the cup. For some reason she keeps looking at me, with a curious expression.

“Okay, what’s up with my face today?” I ask, adding milk to the cups of tea.

“Nothing for once, you are actually smiling. Also, why have you got flowers in your hair?” She asks. I look at her, confused. And resist the urge to feel if there is actually any flowers there, just in case she is joking around with me. 

“I haven’t.” I carry on making the tea.

“Stay still.” She says, standing on her tiptoes and reaching her arm up to the top of my head. Where she pulls a red flower and a white flower from my hair, showing them to me. 

“I don’t know how they got there.” I say, stunned for a moment. They can’t have just fallen onto my head, they would have fallen out by now. They must have been put into my hair. ‘Jason’ I think. He must have put them in there at lunch when he was sat on my shoulders.

I place them by my cup of tea and pick up Jay’s and Mum’s cups, bringing them into the sitting room. Where the two sit, chatting, like they had known each other for ages. I hand them their cups and they each thank me for them. I collect my cup and the flowers from the kitchen before sitting on the couch next to Jason, across from my mum. 

“They’re nice flowers. Did a nice girl at school give them to you?” Mum asks with a subtle smirk. I roll my eyes at her typical mum comment.

“No, I don’t think so.” I reply.

“You should pay more attention next time.” she laughs and shakes her head at me “Your friend here was telling me that he’s a dancer. Perhaps he could teach you something?” She suggests.

“What do you mean? I’m perfectly good at dancing.” I counter, a little offended.

“But you haven’t had lessons for 5 years, surely the times have changed a little. And you only ever dance in your room, so it’s hard to tell how ‘perfectly good’ you are.” she explains what she means.

“Howard was gonna come with me to a dance rehearsal. Perhaps he could show us something and he might make it into the group.” Jason suggests, grinning positively at me.


	10. Chapter 10

Once our drinks have cooled down and we have drank them, me and Jay leave the house, walking to his dance rehearsal. 

I've always liked the look of dance studios, they are so open and light. 

When we enter this dance studio though, it is artificially lit and it feels enclosed. 

“I see you finally decided to turn up.” An older man walks up to us, he can't be a dancer, he's way out of shape. 

“What? Practice starts at 6, it's 6 now.” Jason says to the man, with a confused expression. 

“Whatever. I don't care. Who's this?” He asks with an unfriendly tone. 

“This is Howard. He is interested in joining the group.” Jay says proudly. The older man looks disappointed as he looks from Jay to me and back to Jay. 

“Show him around.” He says unemotionally and goes into another room. 

Jason looks at me and sighs. 

“He's basically a robot. Don't take any notice of him.” He explains and begins to show me around the studio. 

 

The studio isn't too bad. It's not what I expected, it's a little tacky and unorganised. 

“Now, Howie. I would like to show you some of my moves.” Jay says with a massive grin. I grin too, I can't wait to see how amazing he is. I take a few steps back and sit on a pile of mats. Jay takes off his jacket and turns on a stereo, blasting out some upbeat pop tune. 

He bounces up and down doing some kicks and dance moves on the spot. He looks so happy. Once the song sets in it gets to the bridge and Jason jumps onto the floor and does a bunch of shoulder rolls, leaving me stunned. He is really talented!

He stands up once the song finishes with a massive smile on his face and sweat pouring down his neck. He must have really gone all out to show me what he can do. 

“Orange! My office, now!” I hear the older man shout, standing beside the office with a furious expression. This can't be good. I go to follow Jay to his office. But he puts his hand on my shoulder and tells me to sit down and wait here. Something is off, I can sense something isn't right. 

I sit obediently and wait for Jason. 

I become uncomfortable in my seat when I hear raised voices and shouting from the office. I get the uncontrollable urge to burst in there and see what's going on. I fight it for a couple of minutes. Until I hear an almighty crack and something smash within the room. 

I jump from the mats and storm over to the office, my fists clenched in anger. I don't bother to knock, I burst through the wooden door, denting it. 

Within the room, the older man is red faced and he growls from where he stands from beside his desk. 

Jay on the other hand is curled up in the corner of the room, a shattered vase surrounding him. 

“What the fuck are you doing here!” The older man shouts. Turning to face me. 

“To defend my friend from you! You prick!” I say angrily, I don't want to shout. 

“How, get out.” Jason says quietly. Not meeting my eyes.

“No. He shouldn't treat you like this!” I look at him and lower my voice. 

“Howard. Please, I won't be long.” He says, almost pleading for me to leave them be. I fight the urge to pick him up and get him away from this bastard. But the look on Jason’s face makes me turn on my heel and leave the room, fuming with anger at the older man. 

I sit on the mats again and try to calm myself. Who would have thought I would become so aggressive to protect someone I have not even known for a day. 

I suppose that's what you get when you previously were never close to anyone 

Now I have people, I would do near enough anything to keep them close. 

 

A couple of minutes later, Jason walks from the office. But not with his usual perfect posture and stride. He walks, dragging his feet behind him. I can physically feel the depression and sadness as he walks past me, out of the dance studio doors. 

“Jason, what happened?” I ask him, once we are a fair way from the studios. He shoves his hands in his pockets and keeps his head low. 

“I can't be friends with you.” He says bluntly. I am taken aback by his words. 

“What? Why?” I ask, what had I done wrong?

“It's complicated. We just can't be friends.” He repeats, walking faster. 

“Do I get a say in this?” I ask, a little annoyed. 

“No. It's my choice.” He says with no emotion. 

“But I choose to be friends with you, I like you Jason.” I say, innocently. Almost like a small child. 

“That's where the problem is. You can't like me.”

“Is this because of that grumpy bastard who beat you up? Don't listen to him, just leave the squad and make your own way.” I tell him, hoping to make him change his mind. 

“I can't leave. I need Nigel, he's my only chance. And I have no other choice.” Jay says sadly. 

“You will find another chance. You can do it, I know you can.” I smile hopefully, even though he still has his back to me. 

“Howard.” He turns to look at me. “How much do you really know about me?” He asks rhetorically. “We have known each other for nearly 8 hours. It should be easy enough, just let me go.” He smiles sadly. But I can tell there is no actual smile. Just sadness. Because of whatever the old ass crack said to him. Before I can argue, he walks into a garden, opens the door and goes inside. 


	11. Chapter 11

I get back home and flop onto my bunk bed, hoping sleep will tend to my emotional suffering.

“How'd it go?” Mum pushes my door open.

“Absolutely fantastic.” I say sarcastically.

“Shut up Howard. I'm trying to talk to my girlfriend.” I hear my older brother Michael say from the top bunk of the bed. My mum sighs along with me and leaves the room.

I however, grab my phone and text Gary. He had given me his mobile number earlier, along with the other three.

_Hey Gary_

_Hey Howard. How'd it go?_

_Shit. That old man beat up Jason, physically and emotionally. Now Jay says we can't be friends. :/_

_I don't know why he puts up with Nigel’s shit. I'm sure we can snap him out of it, he's probably just overreacting._

_He looked pretty serious to me. I gtg, see you tomorrow yeah?_

_Yeah of course. Bye._

I put down my phone and fall into a deep sleep.

 

The next morning, I try to be cheery but last night's event really left me down in the dumps.

“Hey guys.” I say, chucking my rucksack on the floor and sitting next to Robbie. I notice that Jason is sitting next to Mark on the other side of the table, with the same expression as me. I look over to him and think about saying something. But before I can get my words out, he stands up, grabs his bag and leaves the room.

The remaining 3 look at me.

“What the hell happened between you two?” Rob asks. I explain the events of last night to the three of them.

“Nigel must have been a part of this.” Mark shakes his head and nearly spits out the older mans name.  

“Yeah. And he must have threatened Jay with something important to him.” Rob adds on.

“Maybe his place on the dance squad, you know how important that is for his future.” Gary suggests and the other 2 nod in agreement. I just sit there listening to their suggestions.

“It's time to go. We should continue at lunch.” Gary concludes their 5 minute discussion. We leave the room and start our day of learning.

 

I meet Gary, Mark and Rob on the field where we sat yesterday. I half expected Jason to be there and walk away again. But he didn't show up.

“Why would Nigel think I'm a threat?” I ask them as they discuss further.

“I'm not sure. Maybe you could have became a distraction for Jay.” Mark suggests.

“And he is the only one talented enough to earn Nigel any money, if they get noticed.” Gary continues.

“But why is Jay so worried about being kicked out of the group?” I ask, confused as to why, when he is so vital for Nigel to keep.

“He doesn't see that Nigel is using him. He also thinks he is in constant danger of being kicked out, and that he has no other choice but to put up with Nigel's shit.” Rob explains.

“But really, he could leave the group and everything would be fine because he is so talented.” I conclude.

“Exactly. That's what we have been trying to get across to him for the past 4 years.” Rob sighs.

“He's been controlled by that old bastard for 4 years!” I exclaim. How hasn't he seen the truth yet???

 

For the next couple of days, Jason avoids all of us. Almost as if he will be punished for even being in the same room as us. I'm not sure whether it is all of us he is avoiding, or just me.

“We need to do something about this.” Rob sighs, clearly missing Jason's company. We all are. Though I only knew him for that one day, I felt like I had known him for years, considering how well we got on. And clicked together, I guess is a way to describe it.

The guys and I decided to give Jason a week to come back to us. If he doesn't, we will all go to his house and find out what's wrong with him.

 

During the week that he stayed away from us, I couldn't help but go back to the dance studios after school. Where I knew he would be choreographing some routines. Obviously I couldn't go into the room and watch, because he would see me and most likely walk out of there. So I found a window, which looks in at one of the walls, that is covered in mirrors. So I can see the entire room. Without directly looking at him. 

I'm not sure why but I kept feeling drawn to watch him dance. Maybe because he is so good? Or I just like the way he looks whilst dancing. I wouldn't call it an obsession, because I'm not one for that. But on the other hand, I suppose you could call it stalking, but in a non creepy way. Hopefully. 


	12. Chapter 12

He didn't come back after a week. So we proceeded with our plan and knocked on his door after school on Friday. 

“Hello, Mrs Orange. Is Jay in?” Gary asks politely to the woman who opened the door. 

“Ah, boys hey. It's been awhile since I've seen you lot! Jay is upstairs, come in and take off your shoes.” She stands aside to let us in. She seems like a nice person. 

We all take off our shoes and Jason's mum offers us drinks. She gives us all a carton of orange juice each.

“Orange juice is the favourite in this house, fits quite well I think.” Jay’s mum says. I laugh at the orange pun.

We head upstairs and I follow the others through the long corridor of rooms. I was told he had a big family, but I didn't expect them all to have separate rooms, and for there to be this many. 

Robbie looks at us with a mischievous smirk as we stop at the door. 

“Jay, sweetie. I've brought you orange juice.” Robbie imitates Jason's mum. And it's surprisingly accurate. 

“Okay. Thanks mum.” We hear him say from the other side of the door. We all stifle a giggle, before pulling ourselves together and walking into the room. 

 (Part of Jay's room)

His room is massive! With a big King sized bed and enough floor space for 3 people to do a dance routine without hitting each other.  

Robbie creeps up behind Jason, who is sitting at his desk reading a book, with his back to us. 

“Here you go sweetie!” He imitates again and wraps his arms around Jason’s neck. 

“What the fuck!” Jay exclaims spinning in his chair, making Rob fall into his lap. Us 4 are crying with laughter, whilst Jason sighs at the Orange juice stain on his shirt. 

“LANGUAGE JASON!” We hear Jay’s mum shout up the stairs. Which only makes us laugh harder. 

Jay pushes Rob off of his lap and stands up, glaring at us.

“What are you doing here?” He asks, with a tinge of annoyance. 

“We missed you, lad.” Gary says, falling onto the king bed. 

“And we want to ask why you have been ignoring us.” Mark says, getting straight to the point. Jay sighs. 

“If you really want to know.” He mutters and sits against the headboard of the bed. 

“Ooh Yey! Story time with Jay!” Robbie exclaims and leaps into the bed next to him. Mark and me join the circle and listen. 

“So, the other da-” He begins. 

“Your bed is really comfy.” Gaz cuts him off. Mark whacks him on the arm and he winces before listening. 

“The other day, I was showing How around the dance stu-” Jay continues before being cut off again. 

“Ooh nicknames… Kinky.” Rob winks at me and I accidentally go a shade of red. 

“Shut the fuck up mate.” Jason growls. 

“LANGUAGE!” Jay’s mum bangs her fist on the door. We erupt in another round of laughter, even Jay couldn't fight a small smile. 

“Carry on.” I smile at him once we have calmed down a little. 

“It’s not a big deal, really. Nigel just gave me some advice. He said you lot could be a distraction, especially you How.” He looks at me, with an apologetic expression.

“How would Dougie be a distraction from your dancing?” Gary asks, as confused as all of us.

“Nigel said that he could see I would spend my time trying to show off and impress him. Rather than perfect dances.” He explains.

“I can see where he is coming from.” Rob giggles and Jason shoves him off of the bed.

“Anyway, he said I either stop being your friend or i’m out of the group. And you know how important that is to me.” He looks at us all hopefully, wanting our acceptance.

“Look, lad.” Gary puts his hand on Jay’s shoulder. “He is messing up your life. Leave the squad and show him that you can make your own decisions.”

“But then what will I do?”

“I have an idea!” I say, a little too excitedly. They all look at me, ready to listen to my idea, that will hopefully stop Jason being hurt.

“This music assignment, Miss said that the winners would perform at the end of year concert. And no doubt there will be some talent scouts there. So, if we get our shit together, make good music, add some great dancing, make a great show. We may get noticed by someone.” I explain, feeling a little too hopeful.

“It’s a long shot. But it could work.” Gary says nodding his head “I’ve always loved performing, this could work!” he repeats.

“We could wear something, that stands out and makes us look professional!” Mark suggests.

“We could be famous! And get all the girls! Go to Vegas, LA, New York!” Robbie springs back onto the bed.

“Jay, what do you say?” I ask, proud already that I have convinced the others. Jay looks at me, most likely throwing arguments for and against my idea in his head.

“Let’s do it. I’m done with Nigel’s shit.” He smirks and we all cheer. They are obviously proud that he is finally pushing Nigel’s abuse out of his life. 

“I’m meant to be going to the studios now, should I quit then.” Jason suggests, after all the guys give him a hug. 

We suggest he should get it over and done with, he agrees and in a matter of minutes we leave his house and head back to the school campus.

 


	13. Chapter 13

As we walked, I noticed that Jason seemed to tense up and lose his excitement, with every step closer to our destination. So I decide to let the other 3 skip on ahead whilst I hold back to walk with him.

“You okay?” I ask him, putting an arm on his shoulders.

“Yeah, just a little nervous. Sorry for being a shitty friend, he left me no other choice. I genuinely think you are a great guy, and it was quite difficult to let you go. I’m glad we are friends again.” He smiles a million dollar smile at me.

“I never said that I forgive you.” I tease and smirk.

“Of course you forgive me, you didn’t want to let me go in the first place.” He laughs.

“Only because I never got to ask you why you put flowers in my hair and left them on show there for the whole day.” I join in with his laughing.

“They looked good on you, plus, now your mum thinks some pretty girl has eyes for you. I did you a favour there mate.” He winks at me, before laughing again at my reaction.

“Thanks for the answer, you have now been let go.” I say, dramatically removing my arm from his shoulders. He goes a couple of steps ahead of me before spinning around and pretending to be taken away by the wind.

“Nooooo, don’t let me go.” he continues to spiral away. I smile and shake my head before jogging to catch up with him. He reaches out his arm and I grab his hand.

“ _ I’ll never let you gooo. If you promise not to fade away, never fade awayyyy. _ ” I sing quietly to myself.

“What was that?” he asks as we start to walk properly again.

“Nothing, just a song.” I smile.

 

We arrive at the school a couple of minutes later and I wish Jason luck, before he enters the studio building with Mark and Robbie. Who will wait outside the room for him.

Gary and I wait for a couple of seconds before we become impatient.

“I need to see what’s happening.” Gary states. 

“I know where we can watch, without being in there.” I say, leading him over to the wall which I climb to get to the window. 

“How am I meant to get up there?” Gary asks, pointing at the 6ft wall which i just climbed onto. I lay on my front and lower my arms down to him. After a small struggle, I haul Gaz up onto the roof and we walk over to where the window is.

We sit there, looking through the window, waiting for Jay to walk in. Hopefully he isn’t having second thoughts, but he is more than likely freaking out about it.

“I would ask how you know about this spot. But I have a feeling that I already know why.” Gary looks over at me.

“What do you mean?” I ask him.

“I think that you came up here to watch Jay do his dancing all this week.” He says. I don’t look at him, but I nod my head and confirm that what he said is true.

“Why?” he asks me.

“I don’t know. It felt necessary for some reason.” I say truthfully, running my hand through my hair.

“Look, he’s in.” Gary changes the subject and points down into the room. 

We watch as he calls over Nigel, who doesn’t look happy to see him. Jay explains and tells him that he quits the group. Then he walks away and out of the room, not wanting to hear Nigel’s comeback. Meanwhile, Nigel begins to follow him, waving his arms around manically, shouting most likely.

“That went better than I expected.” Gary says to me. I nod and we descend from the roof. Gary soon takes back his words when the other 3 exit the studio building and Mark has a tidy bruise on his cheek, Robbie looks like he has stuck his fists through several doors. And Jason, well he looks like he got hit by a bus! Who’s to say he didn’t get hit by one. 

“Jesus Christ!” I exclaim and wrap an arm around him, keeping him from falling as he walks. “What happened?” I ask the others.

“The whole dance crew came after us. Those skinny twerps can’t half pack a punch!” Robbie exclaims and touches Mark’s cheek, which Gary is already fussing over.

“Let’s get out of here.” Mark says and bats away Rob and Gary’s hands.

“Where to?” Rob asks, looking slightly offended that Mark pushed him away from helping him.

“My mum would kill me if she saw me like this.” Mark says.

“My house is close. It’s small, but my mum should let us stay in the living room.” I suggest. They all nod and I lead the way, with my arm still stabilising Jason beside me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song which Howard sings a little of is Starlight by Muse.


	14. Chapter 14

“Oh my gosh, what happened?!” My mum exclaims as soon as she opens the door to us 5 on her doorstep. She looks thankful that I am not hurt, but still looks worried about the others.

“I will tell you later, can we all sleep in the living room?” I ask her, inviting my friends into the house. 

“As long as you are not on the run from the police or a gang or a pack of wolves, you can do that.” She says, and we all thank her. I let go of Jay, so I can shut the door and take off my shoes. But when I stand up again to help him to the next room, I notice my mum has already taken him off to the kitchen. Most likely to tidy him up.

“They seem close.” Rob nudges me as we observe him and my mum in the kitchen. I shoot him a disapproving glare and walk into the living room. Where I see Gary holding a wet flannel against Mark’s bruised cheek.

“This is what you are meant to do right?” Gaz asks me, taking the flannel from the younger boy’s face. I nod. Rob then strides into the room and takes the flannel from Gary and holds it against Mark’s face. Gaz literally glares ice at him.

“I was doing that.” He says bluntly.

“I want to help Markie.” Rob replies.

“But you have your own injury to put a flannel on.” Gary counters.

“I know, but Markie comes first.” Rob says seriously. Gary turns his glare to me.

“Dougie, tell him I’m helping Mark.” he says to me, like a little kid. Whining over a petty argument.

“Guys, you can take it in turns to play mother to Mark.” I laugh at them, making both Gaz and Robbie go slightly red in the face. Meanwhile Mark just enjoys all the attention.

 

A little while later, the four of us are all watching big brother on the flat screen tv. Mark sits next to Gary on the sofa opposite the tv, whilst Robbie sits on the floor, in front of the two. Meanwhile I lay sprawled out on the adjacent sofa, closing my eyes and listening to the tv.

I feel a poke on my shoulder and I open one eye to see Jason standing above me, wanting to sit down. He looks a lot better than before, but I can see traces of bruises around the neckline of his shirt. 

I sit up and lean onto one of the arms of the sofa. Jay sits himself down beside me. 

“Your mum’s nice.” He says quietly.

“Yeah, she seems to have a soft spot for you.” I smile at him.

“She’s not the only one.” He gives me a small smile.

“What do you mean?” I ask him.

“You seem to care for me an awful lot, considering how shit i’ve been to you.” he explains.

“True, but like I said before: I like you Jay. And i’ve never really had close friends, so don’t expect me to let you go easily.” I smile.

“Aw that’s sweet. I don’t understand why you have never had close friends. You are a great person to be friends with!” He leans against me and rests his head on my shoulder. I smile shyly at his compliment and put my arm on his shoulders as we watch tv. 

 

A couple of hours later, Robbie, Mark and Gaz are sleeping on the small sofa… somehow. Meanwhile, I am sprawled out on the bigger sofa again, drifting in and out of sleep. Jason has tucked himself beside me, with his back against the back pillows of the sofa. 

“Jay? You awake?” I whisper, feeling him move beside me several times.

“Yeah, did I wake you? Sorry.” He apologises.

“It’s fine, is the sofa uncomfortable?” I ask, wondering whether it is what is keeping him from sleeping.

“Nah. I just find it difficult to sleep, no matter where I am.” He explains. “Mum says that I think too much and can’t relax.”

“Anything I can do to help?” I ask. He props himself up beside me, looking extremely tired.

“I’m not sure, probably not.” He sighs. 

“I have an idea.” I say, after a couple of seconds of thinking. Before I can even tell him my idea, he has already shuffled closer to me, laid his head on my chest and laid his left arm over my stomach. I go still for a second, wondering how he had pretty much read my mind. But before he can look at me questionably, I wrap my left arm around him, pulling him closer.

“This is different.” I grin.

“Hmm, it’s comfortable.” Jason murmurs and I begin to feel very sleepy.


	15. Chapter 15

The next morning, I wake to the sun shining through the open curtains of the living room. I slowly open my eyes, to a rather angelic face a mere inch away from my own. I realise that I must have turned over in my sleep, so that now our chests are pressed together. With any other friend I would more than likely jump a mile and apologise. But to be honest, with Jay, I don't mind so much. More than likely because of 3 reasons. 1: I really can't be fucked to get up. 2: I'm insanely comfortable. 3: This is a nice sight to wake up to.

“Mornin sunshine!” I hear Rob yell from the other couch. Most likely to wake up either Mark or Gaz. But unfortunately he wakes up Jay as well. 

His eyes slowly flutter open before darting around, figuring out how he has managed to end up here. But when he remembers, his expression softens. 

“Hello.” He whispers, cracking his fists from where his hands lie, behind my back. 

“Hi.” I whisper back. I get the sudden urge to show some affection to him. So I attempt to gently stroke his side, where my hand has been laid since I woke. But as I am pretty much still sleeping. So instead of stroking, I accidentally jab him. Which makes him instantly hunch up into a ball, (as he is ticklish there.) Which, in the violent movement, shoves me off of the sofa, onto the floor. 

I lay on the floor laughing along with Jase giggling on the sofa, whilst the other 3 curiously peer over at us.

“Bundles?” Mark suggests, looking from one face to another. I go to stand up before they can jump on me. But I am stopped by Jason rolling off of the sofa, onto my chest. He smirks at me, before Rob jumps onto his back, then Markie, then Gary (who is still half asleep.) 

 

“What is going on in here?” I hear my mum ask from the door. We all laugh and one by one they return to their places on the sofas. I however continue to lay on the floor, grinning stupidly to myself. 

“Is there much for breakfast?” I ask her, hoping there will be enough for all of us.

“Nope, you’d better go to town and eat.” She replies and returns back to her room.

“McDonalds anyone?” Gaz suggests. I sit up and nod, along with the others.

“Then shall we work on the songs?” Jay suggests. We agree with that too.

“At my house?” Says Mark. We nod again.

“Then go out on the town tonight?” I propose. They all look at me with childish smirks.

“AND GET ABSOLUTELY SMASHED!” Rob exclaims. Gary whacks him around the head and Mark sighs mockingly. “What was that for!” He returns Gary’s slap. “It’s Saturday, no school tomorrow, the bartender owes me a favour- so I say a night of free drinking!”

“That actually doesn’t sound that bad.” I nod, liking Rob’s proposal.

“Yesss Dougie! My new drinking buddy! Screw you lot.” He slides onto the floor and put an arm on my shoulders.

 

Our mates, didn’t agree with Rob’s idea that morning, mainly because of the fight the day before. However after 2 weeks of constant whining, they gave in. So we once again, stayed at my house the night before (Friday) and found out there was no cereal in the house. 

In result, we were again starting with breakfast at McDonalds, where Gary manages to eat 5x more than Jay. Which I have found isn’t that difficult. I’m surprised he has the energy to get up in the morning, only running on a leaf or two. I’ve found that his healthy lifestyle is one of the most used running gags within the group. Along with Gary’s love for food, Mark’s obsession with scarves and hats. Also Rob, sounding like the oldest, when in fact he is the youngest at 14! I didn’t realise that there is 6 years between us. Surely he shouldn’t be drinking at such a young age, but I suppose he looks 18. 

So, we had breakfast, then did some window shopping in town. Before heading over to Mark’s house again, who I have just found out, is 16. Jeez I feel so old already! Thankfully, Jason and Gary aren’t that different in age to me, at 18 and 17.

At Mark’s house, we brainstormed some song ideas and wrote out some lyrics; in the office room of his house. Which is equipped with loads of instruments and a small recording device, set up a desk.

Gaz got furthest, near enough finishing his song. But then again, I have found he has a talent for instantly creating original song lyrics and piano chords to accompany them. Mark also seemed to do quite well, producing a rather catchy beat for his song. Similarly to ‘Shine’, his song made me want to sing along and join in the fun he seemed to be having. 

Robbie, on the other hand to the more serious songwriters, fucked around more than anything. Creating parody songs and silly songs. 

I came up with a few ideas for a couple of different songs and assisted with harmonies for the other boys’ songs. I don’t think Jason really said much at all during our hours there. He mainly sat listening, occasionally offering his opinion and snacking on a bag of caramel covered nuts. Which we constantly teased him about, as you can imagine. I noticed he scribbled down a line or two in the band’s shared notebook of songs. But when I went to find the page in the book later, it had clearly been ripped out. I wonder why.

Now, we have just finished up the delicious meal that Mark’s mother cooked up for us. We all thank her and head out the door for our ‘night on the town’.

“Where to first? My four amigos!” Mark says excitedly, skipping along the path from his garden, onto the main path beside the road. I look up at the sky and notice it is already dusk and getting darker by the minute. I’m sort of hoping we won’t be out for long, mum would kill me if I came back at 4am, totally shattered.

“Hold on. What are we doing at the end of our legendary night?” I ask the group, as we stroll up the road.

“You could all crash at my place. It’s in the town centre, so we won’t have to go far.” Rob suggests.

“Noice. Sounds like a plan. How about, we jump into whatever pub, bar or club we pass. And see how far through town we can get?” I suggest. Quite eager to start the night and make it a good one, now that I know I will not face the wrath of my mother in the morning.

“Yesss Howard! That is a bloody good plan, mate. This is why you are my drinking buddy!” Robbie exclaims proudly, jabbing me in the ribs before skipping off ahead with Mark. 

I turn to look at Gary and Jason, who are also looking quite proud and ready to begin the night.

 

“FIRST PUB ON THE LEFT LADS!” Mark sprints back to us, informing us of the news, before sprinting the other way, to where Rob waits for us; rather impatiently. 

“C’mon! We don’t have all night!” Rob shouts to us “Oh wait… We do!” He erupts with laughter at his joke. The three of us shake our heads with a smile, picking up our pace, to catch up with the hyper lads.

Once we are in the pub, Rob strolls up to the bar and reels off what I know is a long quote from the movie ‘The World's End’. Gary notices it as well, as we sit at a table. But Jason is completely oblivious to it.

“Oh, mate. Just so you know, Jason is near enough a technophobe.” Gary pokes my arm. I look at Jay in awe.

“Seriously. It’s 2016, how can you do this?” I wonder out loud.

“It just don’t interest me.” Jason replies, sitting on the seat opposite myself.

“He doesn’t have a phone or anything.” Gaz shakes his head in mock disappointment.

“What! But you gave me his number the other week.” I say confused.

“It’s my mum’s number.” Jay reveals, almost embarrassed.

“Aw Jayyyy.” I say, reaching over the table and patting his shoulder.

“Get this down yah!” Rob and Mark return to the table and hand us all our alcoholic drinks I’m not sure what they bought for each of us. But I try the drink they presented to me, and it’s pretty damn good.


	16. Chapter 16

4 pubs and 3 clubs later, we have ended up in another club. The most insane one of the lot. There are so many people, bouncing around on the dance floor and swaying around the large room. Literally everyone in here is either drunk or high. Same could be said for us I suppose.

Robbie, is the most, by far. He can barely walk and is currently in the middle of the crowd on the dancefloor. I’m pretty sure that 3 pubs in, he went out and found a dealer. Because he is more than drunk. Mark is too, he joins Rob on the dancefloor and they attempt to do a slow dance to a song that everyone else is moshing to. I sit on the sidelines, by the bar, laughing at the younger two. I’ve been quite careful with my drinking tonight, someone has to find the way to Rob’s without passing out in an alley.

I’ve lost sight of Jay, who was considerably hammered last time I saw him. He most likely picked up a girl somewhere around here, he seems like that type of guy. I would usually be the one to do that, but not tonight, maybe next time.

We left Gaz on a bench after the 1st club we went to. I’ve found he can’t hold his drink for shit. Hopefully he won’t get mugged or killed. We will find out tomorrow.  

 

I get up from my stool and place my empty glass on the bar. I sway a little before regaining my balance. I stroll over to Rob and Mark, who still attempt to master the slow dance.

“DOUGIE!” They both exclaim as they notice me next to them. 

“Ey lads!” I exclaim back and get into the groove of the song.

“Show us some moves!” Mark nudges me. Moving my attention to the empty space on the dancefloor. I get the uncontrollable urge to jump over there and do a couple of flips. 

Before I can rethink the idea, I am already there. I do a backflip, a shoulder roll and a load of dance moves that just feel right.

By the time the song is over and I finally stop to breath, I have attracted a crowd. Who all clap, cheer and raise their glasses. I take a bow and accept all the admiration.

But then a gap is made in the crowd and Jason struts through. We both stand opposite each other, staring right at one another. 

“IT LOOKS LIKE WE ARE GONNA HAVE A DANCE OFF!” I hear Rob’s voice, blaring through the mic on the stage. I turn to see him and Mark up there, watching us.

I turn back to Jay, who seems far too excited, but to be honest so am I. A dance battle? Well, i’ve got to win. I bounce on my feet and pound my chest, the crowd cheers and Jay takes a step back, motioning that the floor is all mine, for now. 

“Go Howard, Go Howard GO!” Robbie cheers though the mic as I pump myself up with a couple of simple dance off moves, before dropping down to the floor and spinning my body around on my hands. I rise back onto my feet, right in front of Jason’s face before jumping back to the other side, waiting to see what he’s got to beat that.

“Ohh NOO. Go Jason, Go Jason, Go Jason!” Robbie cheers as Jay does a couple of simple moves. Before flipping onto the floor and doing a shoulder roll and returning onto his feet, a couple of times. Once he’s done. He jumps high in the air and flicks out his arms in a mocking style. He then drops to his knees and motions that the floor is mine again. 

Robbie starts to rap along to our dance off, making the crowd join in with a couple of “EYY”’s.

The dance off goes on for a while, us taking turns in the spotlight. Occasionally, at the end of our routine, we playfully shove and mock each other.

It isn’t until he begins to carry out amazing, continuous shoulder rolls, one onto the other; that I realise I have well and truly lost. Robbie stops rapping and announces Jay’s name to the audience. I stand completely gobsmacked as he continues his circle of shoulder rolls, I wasn’t aware he was  _ this _ good! 

He ends his cycle of shoulder rolls and rises to his feet, mere centimeters away from my face. He knows he’s won and he smirks at me, looking me dead in the eyes. Before closing the gap between us, for a split second. Then he pats me on the shoulder and turns around, to accept the cheers of what was our audience. It is now his.


	17. Chapter 17

After the dance battle, I am left with several questions swimming around my thoughts and 3 increasingly drunken friends. Neither of them seemed to think much of Jay’s ending to the battle, they just pat him on the back and congratulate his win. So, I decide not to dwell on my thoughts and continue on with the night.

Which doesn’t last much longer, due to us having to drag Robbie along the dancefloor and out of the club. Because he shouted a few too many curse words at the dj and a majority of the crowd, as well as jabbing a large bouncer in the stomach, asking if he was pregnant. We decided to get out, before everyone decides to gang up on us.

Myself and Jase put one of Rob’s arms on each of our shoulders, so we can assist him on our short trek to his house. Mark leads the way, slowly skipping in front of us. 

“Just here.” He announces, stopping at a small terrace house, getting out his keys and unlocking the door.

We follow him into the house and let Rob go. He stumbles up the stairs and into one of the bedrooms. We follow him, after Mark has locked the door and turned on the lights.

“This… My tall drinking buddy, is my crib!” Rob exclaims, slinging an arm on my shoulders and turning on the light of the room.

The room is surprisingly large, like all of my friend’s rooms. But what makes Rob’s room different, is that it has so much free space, with only a single bed, wardrobe and… stripper pole… in the room. I couldn’t help laughing when I saw it fixed in the centre of the room.

“Don't judge mate. You would be surprised at how much attention it gets when the lads come over.” Rob chuckles and nods his head at Jay, who has instantly strolled over to it. 

“You know this isn’t Rob’s actual house right? This is a place that basically anyone can crash in.” Jay explains to me from the centre of the room.

I slide down the wall and sit with my back against it. Watching the three of them. 

Mark has found a CD player and some CDs in the bottom of Rob’s wardrobe. He plugs it in and finds a CD which literally makes his eyes light up. 

“Oh my god guys! Do you remember this?!” He exclaims and puts the CD on. A groovy beat begins and the three of them look at each other, smiling manically and stifling a laugh. 

“Relight my fire!” Robbie exclaims “Now this is a classic!” 

“We only recorded it last year Rob!” Jason laughs. Casually walking around the pole. I get confused for a moment, but then I hear Gary’s voice through the speakers. I laugh to myself as I listen to the lyrics. 

As the song gets to the chorus, the three of them get into a line and perform a routine. Robbie basically just improvises whilst the other two are perfectly in time. 

Once the chorus is over, they break the formation and go off to do their own things. Rob dances like he is at a rave party, Mark stomps his foot on the floor and punches the air. Whilst Jay… spins around the pole. It was, very amusing to watch. I have a feeling I could do better spins on that thing, but why interrupt when he clearly has a talent for this. 

I don't know quite what to think though, as throughout the entire time, he kept eye contact with me as much as possible. 

For the rest of the song, they carried on as they were, joining in on the chorus. And Jay sung the woman's verse, whilst Mark and Rob pretended to worship him. Which was one of the most hilarious things I have ever seen. 

“What…. Was that?” I ask, laughing, once the song is finished. 

 

I wake while it is still dark outside. I am on the floor, on a blanket and a shit load of pillows. As Mark and Rob had decided to hog the bed. 

I stretch and crack my back, loosening the cramp from sleeping on the hard floor. 

I sit up and I can feel someone watching me. It bothers me for a moment, but the buzzing of my phone takes my mind off of it. I pick it up and notice several texts from mum and Michael. All of them worried about where I am, considering the state I brought my friend's back in a couple of weeks ago. I suppose already they have made a not so great impression. Though I think no matter what, mum will still be okay with Jay. 

I send a message back to both of them, confirming i am okay and just crashing at Rob's place. I decide to not tell them any more than that. 

I put my phone back in my pocket and stand up, before heading downstairs. I need a drink, for some reason I doubt Robbie will have anything good. I find the fridge, in the mess of the kitchen. There is a couple of beers, so I grab one and open it. 

I can still feel someone watching me and it gives me the shivers again. I know no one is there, but it still creeps me out. 

I quickly trot out of the room and back up the stairs. I use the torch on my phone, to find my way back to my blanket and pillows. 

But when I turn on my torch, I find that Jason is sleeping there. I smirk and sit beside him. 

“Jayyy” I call quietly, I can see a small smile appearing on his face. I poke him in the chest, hoping to move him. But he only smiles wider. 

“C’mon Jay mooove” I shove him off of the pillows, but just as I think I have my space back, he grabs onto me as he rolls from the pillows. I end up rolling over with him and eventually he is laid on top of me. 

“You happy now? I’ve moved.” He smirks.

“Not quite in the way I intended. But yeah, i’m pretty happy now.” I smirk back. He laughs and rests his hands on my chest. But then his face turns a little serious. He sends me a questioning look. “What?” I ask.

“Is that a nipple ring?” He asks. Feeling around my chest again.

“Yeah. I have both pierced and my left eyebrow.” I explain. He looks at my eyebrows, confused as to why he can’t see the bar. “I have clear bars in, policy of the school.” I explain.

“Ah. Mum would kill me if I got piercings. She’s a mormon.”

“So that’s why your family is so big. Are you mormon?” I ask.

“Nah, I love tea too much and I’d rather spend my Sundays doing more exciting things than church.” He pauses. “Also, I don’t reckon I will have kids or get married to a nice girl any time soon.” He looks a little sad or disappointed or nervous, the expression is difficult to read.

“Don’t give up hope mate. You’re only 18, you have loads of time to find a sweet girl to settle down with.” I pat his shoulder, hoping to cheer him up. But he only looks away from me and rests his head on my chest. “Heh, I can imagine loads of little Jasons. How cute is that.” I laugh to myself. But Jason only grunts.

I decide to stop talking about that subject, as he doesn’t seem very happy talking about it. We lay in silence for a couple of minutes as I think of something else to talk about.

“We have a youtube channel by the way. For the band.” Jay breaks the silence.

“You got many subscribers?” I ask, wondering if they had already gained some popularity on there. 

“About 2500. We’ve only posted 5 or so covers, 1 original song and an introduction to us. So I suppose for that 2500 isn’t too bad.” He explains.

“Sounds good. I have a couple of ideas on how we could gain a following on there.” I say. Wondering if my hobby of filming may assist in some way. Jay lifts his head from my chest and looks at me.

“Do you wanna go downstairs and come up with some ideas?” He asks with a tinge of excitement. “Unless you would rather go back to sleep.” he quickly adds. 

“Aw how thoughtful.” I tease and I notice that he blushes a little. Which makes me laugh. “But nah, let’s go.” I continue and he rolls off of me, standing up. I rise to my feet and follow him down the stairs and into a nice little room, which I didn’t realise was there before. It looks more like a cupboard from the outside.

“This is so tidy compared to the rest of the house.” I state, closing the door behind me. He grabs the laptop from a small table and sits cross legged on the large couch.

“It is. No one comes in here other than us 4. Most people assume this is a cupboard. Which is great in this house, with the amount of party goers Rob brings back.” He explains, turning on the laptop. I sit down beside him, watching it load. “I also decorated this room.” he adds.

“So you didn’t bother doing the rest of the house up?” I ask rhetorically, which makes him laugh.

“Didn’t think it was worth it.” He smiles, typing in the password.

“I see why.” I nod. “You’re a painter and decorator then?” I ask.

“Whenever they need an extra pair of hands really. I was part of the dance crew called ‘Streetmachine’ a while back, we used to perform at the Apollo.” He tells me. 

“Streetmachine?” I ask, I swear I have heard of them before.

“Yeah. We won a spot to dance on tv.” That’s where I recognise them from!

“I’ve heard of you guys before. You were all the girls up in my old town talked about. I think someone even made some merch for you.” I explain to him. He looks quite shocked.

“Really? I didn’t think anyone noticed us, the programme we were on had really shit viewer ratings.”

“I think someone recorded a piece of the programme and sent it to everyone in the town.” I laugh. “So, the youtube channel?” I ask, noticing Jay has loaded up the page.

“Yeah, bit simple aint it.” he sighs. 

“I’m sure we can make it a little more… upbeat.” 


	18. Chapter 18

We spend the next couple of hours editing the channel art and coming up with ideas on how to increase our following.

**_Channel Ideas: Take That._ **

 

  * __Intro to the 5 of us.__


  * _Covers uploaded every week_


  * _Original songs uploaded whenever_


  * _Q & A_


  * _Vlog??_



 

It’s nearly midday by the time Rob and Mark wake, with more than a mild hangover each. By the time they find us in the closet room, we have given up and sit on the couch, just talking about whatever comes to mind.

I seem to be able to talk to Jason easily, not being afraid that he will judge whatever I think and say. Which is nice, relaxing almost.

 

“Never again.” Rob moans, putting on his sunglasses and squeezing his forehead. Me and Jay laugh as the two shuffle into the room.

“You said that last time mate.” Jay tells him with a chuckle.

“Whatever.” Rob strikes back. 

“Chill Robbie. So what have you two been up two?” Mark asks us. I am about to explain our ideas, but Rob cuts me off.

“They have been flirting and kissing and fuc-” he begins to say, before Mark jabs him in the side, making him putter and stop. Mark looks rather embarrassed at his friend’s words, I turn to look at Jay, to find he is already looking at me. But before I can read his expression he turns away and tells Mark all our ideas.

 

“What do you say that we head back to our own houses, get changed and meet at Gary’s house in an hour?” Mark suggests excitedly, once he has heard our plan. We all agree and I am back at my house soon after. 

When I get in the door, I find mum looking rather worried as she paces over to me. She must think I had been all night, doing some dodgy shit. But I gradually sway her off of that idea, by telling her about our plans for today and the music competition. To which she seems to be very excited about already.

Once I have got her off my back, I head upstairs to shower and freshen myself up. I had forgot to have a shower yesterday, so after the night of clubs, I stink. 

I finish my shower and stroll into my room, making sure my brothers aren’t in there first. Finding they are already out at work, or whatever, I grab some nice clothes to wear. A pair of black jeans, black tank top along with a red and blue checkered shirt over the tank top (like a jacket.) I also find a nice necklace on one of the cabinets, so I put that on. I replace my transparent bars for an eyebrow ring on each side. Then I chuck on some socks and some boots, before heading out of the door and to Gary’s.


	19. Chapter 19

Once I get there, I notice Gaz, Mark and Jase sitting at the window waiting for me. I bet that Rob will be late, or won’t bother turning up.

I am right, he turns up 2 hours late. 

In that time, the four of us sent out a post on all the social medias, under the band's name. Telling the followers that a new member (me) had joined the band, and that we will be making a Q&A video to get to know us all better. So we invited them to post questions to us, and we will answer them in the video.

By the time Rob gets to Gary’s, we have already received over 20 questions throughout all the sites. Which isn’t too bad at all.

Gaz sets up a camera on a tripod, focusing it just above his double bed. We all sit on it, in a sort of semicircle. 

“Hello viewers, we are Take That. And today we will be answering your questions in a Q&A.” Gary introduces once the camera is on, he sounds like a natural showman. 

“But first, it's been a while, so we will re-introduce ourselves and our new band member.” Mark says. We go around the semicircle, saying our names and what we do in the band. 

Once that is over, we get on with the Q&A. Mark scans through the questions on his phone. 

“That's a bit… Explicit” he laughs at one of them. 

“C’mon read it out!” Rob smirks. 

“Maybe later. Ooh this is a nice one to start with. ‘Who has the worst dress sense?’” He asks. We all smirk at each other before pointing at Gary, who looks genuinely surprised and offended. 

“Next question.” Gaz dismisses us taking Mark’s phone. “Have you got any cool talents?” he asks.

“I can do the splits and beatbox.” I tell the guys. 

“At the same time?” Jason giggles, with an amused smile on his face.

“Possibly. I’ve never attempted it.” I say and Jay smirks.

“Go on How, try it.” He flicks his eyes over to the clear floor space at the end of the bed. I smile and hop off of the bed. Mark grabs the camera and points it at where I  stand. 

“I bet you’ve got some hidden talents.” I point at Jason.

“I can spin on my head and do a scooby doo impression.”

“At the same time?” I ask smirking as I repeat his question from earlier. 

“More than likely.” He accepts the challenge. 

“Come here and perform with me.” I smirk at him, he strolls over to me obediently. “I need some backing music. Sing or somethin.” I tell Gary, Rob and Mark. Mark mouths something to Gary and he nods vigorously. He then whispers to Rob, who also nods.

“Once you've tasted love it is just the beginning of a new world”  They begin to sing a new song which we have only just completed. Which Jay and me have came up with a basic routine. We join in the singing and begin our choreography.

“Once you've tasted love there's no way you can give in 

Can't control your mind and your head is still spinning 

Once you've tasted love is just the beginning”

“Once you've tasted loveeee”  I sing the line alone, with the others harmonising in the background. Whilst singing the line I lower myself down into the splits then do a little bit of beatboxing. Beside me Jay spins on his head and does the impression of scooby doo. Which sounds pretty good but I don’t get a proper look at him doing it though.

Mark then pans the camera to Rob who has continued the song, showing of his talent for rapping.

“I like your voice.” Jay whispers to me, once we are back on our feet. 

“Thanks. I like the way you dance.” I compliment back. 

“If you two are done flirting, we have more questions to answer.” Mark laughs. We smile and return back to the bed. 

“What's the favourite part of your body?” Gaz asks, looking at us all, but he decides to go first. “I rather like my hands. Good for playing piano.” He shows the camera his hands. 

“And doing other things.” Rob teases. Which results in Gaz swearing at him and a pillow to his face. 

“What's this bit called?” Mark asks, pointing at his hip. “It has a nice feeling. Jason what about you?” He asks. Jay’s face becomes rather mischievous.

“Nipples.” He says simply. 

“Nipples?” I ask. He nods.

“Yeah, they're constantly, erect.” He confirms. 

“Can we have a little peek?” Rob asks. Jason rolls his eyes at him. 

“Just a quick look.” Jay laughs, getting closer to the camera. He lifts up his shirt for a couple of seconds, before moving back to beside me. 

“Why don't you keep it off? I'm sure the viewers would enjoy that.” I suggest with a little laugh. The others agree with me and he sighs, with a small smile, taking it back off. And throwing it dramatically across the room. 

“Ey lad, go pick that up.” Gary tells him. But Jase just smirks at him and doesn't move. 

“How, what's your favourite?” He asks me. I think for a moment.

“Errr, my tongue.” I near enough ask. “It’s a long one.” I explain, sticking it out.

“Not bad, my friend. My favourite is my-” Rob begins to start talking.

“Keep it PG Rob.” Gaz sighs.

“PG?” Rob moans, disappointed. Gary nods. “Fine, my fingers.” Robbie tells the camera, casually flipping Gaz off. We all laugh, even Gary. 

“Alright then mate. Next question: In future what type of girl are you guys looking to settle down with?” Gary asks us. I notice that Jay sighs to himself and looks uncomfortable, just like this morning when the subject was brought up. 

“Someone who won't mind goin to football with me.” Rob nods, looking quite dreamy eyed, as he thinks of his perfect girl. 

“A music lover for me definitely. Howard?” Says Gaz. 

“A good friend. Someone I know well and get on with easily.” I say truthfully, wouldn't like to date a girl who I know nothing about. “Markie?” I ask. 

“Erm. Someone who will love me, and have my babies.” He says, we all tease him and say ‘aww’ before he switches it around “Then she can bugger off after that.” He says dramatically. Making us all laugh at his sudden change of heart. 

“Jase, what about you?” I ask, mid laugh. He sits quietly for a moment, until we all stop laughing. 

“Like Howard said, a good friend.” He nods, happy with his answer. 

“Aw ye like Howard?” Rob teases. Jay goes a tinge red and all the guys make a drumroll. 

“A little.” He murmurs, loud enough that we can hear him, but quiet enough that the camera can’t pick it up. Both Mark and Rob erupt in near enough full on fangirl screams and laughter, over using the phrase ‘oh my God’. Gary however, looks really pissed off at Rob. Though he covers it up, because the camera is still recording.

“Mark, pause the recording. Rob, can I have a word with you.” Gary instructs. Mark bounces off of the bed and turns off the camera for now. Whereas, Rob, does not listen to Gary’s instructions and instead pulls the most mischievous face I have ever seen. 

“This isn’t going to end well.” Jay whispers in my ear. Making me shiver unexpectedly.

 

He likes me? A little? What does ‘a little’ mean? Used to? Does now? Only as a friend? Or from an admiration point of view? Something more??? 


	20. Chapter 20

For every day after that one, those questions are unanswered. I hope to get some answers eventually. 

It has been 6 months since I met the guys. 

A couple of weeks ago I got a job, as a full time vehicle painter. I intend to use the money I earn on some dj turntables and some new gear for the band. 

In a couple of months, we will perform our songs, and hope to please the talent scout guy there.

I was practising singing my song, when Gary sent a message to the band’s group chat. So I flop onto my bed and unlock my phone to see the conversation.

_ Gaz- Lads, I need help. My little cousin needs babysitting, and I don’t know how to cope with little kids. _

_ Rob- Markie is great with kids! We should all join you on your babysitting experience. _

_ Gaz- That would be great, thanks Rob! The thing is, we need to do more than babysit my cousin. _

_ Me- What else have you got to do?  _

_ Gaz- Do the shopping, clean the apartment, cook for my cousin, wash their car. Loads of stuff. _

_ Rob- Urgh sounds like work. Count me out. _

_ Mark- C’mon Rob! Sounds like responsability.  _

_ Rob- Marko… what has happened to u? When did u become so… elderly? _

_ Gaz- Did I mention that my Uncle is relatively rich, has a massive penthouse apartment, in Barcelona. A couple of streets from the beach. What do you say to a week in the sun?  _

_ Rob- I’m in. R we gettin paid?  _

_ Gaz- Yeah, idk how much. But he’s paying for our flight over there & back.  _

_ Me- Sounds like fun. I will come along.  _

_ Mark- Same. When does he want you over there? _

_ Gaz- Saturday. _

_ Me- As in this Saturday? 2 days time? _

_ Gaz- Yup. Jay, r u coming? (I can see u readin the chat btw) _

_ Jay- I’m not great with flyin. But yeah ok. _

_ Me- I thought you didn’t have a phone. _

_ Jay- It’s Justin’s. He’s out atm. _

_ Gaz- So meet at the airport. 1.00PM Friday. _

 

We made it onto the flight (just) thanks to Rob and Markie turning up late. And after 2 hours of Jay grasping my hand as tight as possible, we land in Barcelona. 

“I still can’t feel my hand by the way.” I turn to Jay in the passenger seat of our rental car.

“Sorry mate.” He pats me on the shoulder. I turn to look at him again, noticing that his new hairstyle makes him even more good looking than when I first met him. He would more than likely be the teen heartthrob of the band if we were to become famous. 

“How. Focus on the road, not me.” Jay snaps me out of my thoughts. I can feel myself blush as I focus properly on the road in front of us.

We eventually find our way to Gary’s uncle’s house. (Gaz, being in the other car with Rob and Mark, so he couldn’t direct us. We were originally going to go in a big family car, but they found a snazzy yellow car with limited seating. So we couldn’t all fit in it.)

“I see what Gaz meant.” Jay says to me, gazing at the large apartment in front of us. 

“Hey guys. Drop your bags in the spare room for now. We gotta say bye to Gary’s uncle.” Mark skips up to us. We do as he says and when we enter back in the room, Gary’s uncle appears to already be setting out the ground rules for our babysitting experience.


	21. Chapter 21

We all say our goodbyes together as he disappears into the elevator, after a 15 minute long lecture on why we are not allowed to invite anyone over for a party. I reckon we will end up having a party though. Mark pats Emily’s head (Gaz’s cousin).

“Are you ready to go to bed?” He asks her. I glance out of the window and notice it must be around 5.00. Bit early for her to go to bed I think.

“No!!” She exclaims and pouts. We all share a look and decide on how to go about this.

“Remind me why your uncle called you over from another country to babysit her.” Rob says to Gary. I too have been wondering that.

“Honestly, I have no idea. But it’s a nice week away ain’t it lads?” Gaz replies and we all nod in agreement.

“Right. I’m gonna start cooking, c’mon Emily, you can help.” Mark says, taking Emily’s hand as she eagerly follows him into the kitchen area. “Rob, go to the supermarket. There isn’t anything other than pasta in here.” Mark shouts a couple of seconds later.

Rob huffs and rolls his eyes, but does as he is told and leaves the building. 

“You want us to do anything?” Jay asks Mark, walking across the room. Mark skips over to us, holding a list, which Gary’s uncle gave him.

“How and Jay, clean the cars.” He tells us. “Gaz, clean the music room.” 

“Yess. Get in!” Gaz exclaims, a little too enthusiastically.

“Surely it won’t take 2 of us to clean the car.” I state.

“ _ Car _ _ s _ _. _ There is more than one.” 

“Ah.” 

A couple of minutes later myself and Jay are gazing at the two posh cars in the garage. We drive them out into the car park, which is way more deserted than I thought it would be. 

“I wouldn't mind one of these.” I say aloud, touching the bonnet of the 1958 Chevrolet Impala. I notice Jay is doing the same with the 1951 Mercury. 

We get buckets and sponges to clean the cars with, and we soon get to work. 

 

“I feel like that girl.” Jay laughs out loud a while later. Scrubbing the bonnet of the car. 

“Who?” I giggle. Jay would make a very nice lady. I wonder if I could get him in a dress?

“I don't know her name. But she goes like this:” he says laying seductively across the bonnet of the car, cleaning it at the same time. “And she's trying to get the guys attention who is fixing a car.” He explains, continuing to pose on the car. 

“And at one point does the guy do this:” I say smirking, slowly taking off my tank top. He laughs. “Isn't she meant to be very turned on by now?” I ask. Posing against my car. Jason looks at me mischievously. 

“Who says she's not?” He says in a teasing tone. I breath heavily and wonder whether he is actually being serious. He seems to notice my change in expression. 

“I'm just kidding How, you need to achieve a torso like mine to get the girls going.” He laughs. I take the opportunity to throw my sponge at him as he jumps off of the car. 

“Eww Howww. That's wet!” He exclaims. I am about to make an inappropriate comeback but he interrupts me. 

“Get your mind out of the gutter.” He laughs before I can even begin. 

“I'll tell you what else is about to get wet.” I say completely innocently. Noticing the dark clouds gathering above us 

“What?” He asks. 

“All of you.” I continue being completely innocent. 

“I don't think so mate.” He smirks. 

“Oh really?” I say. And mere seconds later it begins to rain. 

“You did that on purpose!” He exclaims, laughing. 

“Of course. I wouldn't have made it rain by accident.” I pause. “Do you feel the urge to dance?” I ask. Feeling overwhelmed with this urge. 

“In the rain?” He tilts his head. 

“No in the apartment.” I say sarcastically. He sighs affectionately at my humour. 

“Yeah. I feel it too.” He nods. 

We spend the next half hour dancing and laughing in the rain. 


	22. Chapter 22

“Did you get the cars cleaned?” Gary asks when we exit the elevator. We both shake our heads. “You're kidding right? You were both out there for ages!” He continues. 

“It's raining out there. It wasn't worth it.” I explain. 

Gary huffs at my ‘excuse’ and goes back to playing the piano. 

“Did you even clean in here?” I ask him. Noticing how everything is as unorganised as before. He turns to look at me with an annoyed expression. 

“I've been doing more important things. Anyway I've done more in the last 10 minutes than you and Jay have done in the past hour!” He exclaims. 

“What, by sitting on your arse? When all of us are actually trying to appease your uncles demands. Have you even bothered to help Markie cook for Emily??” I argue back. Rather pissed with his offish attitude. 

“Guys calm down!” Jay steps in. “Gaz you could do more to help out”

“Thank you Jason.” I say aloud, glad he has decided to take my side in this petty argument. 

Gaz looks between us and grumbles. Before going back to his piano. We stroll into the bedroom, because neither of us have unpacked. 

I chuck my clothes lazily into a drawer. Jay looks at me with a serious expression. 

“You're not going to leave them in there like that.” He points at my clothes. 

“That's how I normally organise my clothes.” I say in mock offence. He smiles. 

“Well as you are sharing a room with me, you are going to actually organise your clothes.” He commands. I laugh at his seriousness, but get to work on organising.

“What are you doing?” Jason asks a couple of seconds later. 

“Organising” I say innocently. He sighs.

“Move, let me do it.” He gently moves me away with his arm. I laugh affectionately at him, moving over to my bed. Where I lay, in a relaxed style, watching him arrange my clothes. 

It is only then I realise how delicately he moves. Yeah I've seen him dance like that and he walks like that. But I've never had the chance to silently admire him like this. His expression furrowed in thought, figuring out how to appease his sudden burst of ocd. Occasionally, what is left of the light of would bounce off his face, making it seem almost angelic to look at. 

I've never had any shame expressing my admiration and feelings. I had had plenty up where I used to live. But there is just… something about Jay. 

“All those pretty things don't sweat the pretty things. So collectable, why not collect them all. Obviously cunningly womanly. All those pretty things. God bless the pretty things.” I sing out loud. He smiles shyly, still organising my clothes. 

“Are you flirting with me Mr Donald?” He asks, suddenly becoming quite sly. 

“Of course Mr Orange. How could I not flirt with my slightly schizophrenic, oh so slightly ocd and a little out of reach best friend.” I smirk at him. 

“That would make a good song. You should write those down and sing them.” He replies. 

“You should sing them.” I state. Not having heard him sing alone at all in the past. 

“Another time, maybe.” He says and I sigh. 

“What's the matter Howie? Did I stop your flirting too soon?” He teases and turns to look at me. 

“I had many cheesy pick up lines left to use.” I reply. 

“Shame.” He says and I stick my tongue out at him. 

“SOMETHING’S BURNING!” I hear Gaz shout from the other room. Me and Jay look at each other and laugh. Gary doesn't seem to be having the best of days. 

The bedroom door swings open. 

“Can you two come watch over Emily? She's making a right mess and dinners burning.” Mark says quickly, before disappearing again. 

Jase takes his time to finish organising my clothes. But eventually we go out of the room to look after Emily. Surprisingly, we find the apartment hasn't burned down yet. 

I tap Emily on the head and take the salt bottle from her. Which she was using to spill salt all over the table, mostly to annoy Mark. Who, is rushing around the kitchen, balancing cooking and talking on the phone. 

“Move” he instructs, as he paces past me. Scouting round various cupboards. I make a cup of tea and begin to chat with Emily for a little while, finding out why her father moved from Britain to Spain. Which actually turned out to be a quite interesting story. 

“What's his name?” She asks me. Pointing at Jay, who is currently dancing in front of a mirror. I smile at the sight, he's so passionate about his dancing. 

“Jason.” I say, feeling weirdly proud. She looks at me seriously. 

“Are you married?” She asks, furrowing her eyebrows in thought. I can't help but laugh at her innocence. 

“Nah. We're not married.” I reply, smiling into my cup of tea. 

“Oh.” She sounds surprised. 

“Why did you think that?” I ask curiously. 

“I saw you dancing outside and you are happy when you are together.” She explains. Looking quite proud of her findings. 

“We are happy together. Just as good friends. Do you have a best friend who makes you happy?” I ask her, wanting to change the focus from me. 

“YES” she exclaims, excited to tell me about her friend. “Tom is my best friend. We play football and I help him in maths!” 

“There you go, you are best friends and aren't married.” I say “Or are you?” I ask jokingly. Which makes her laugh. 

“Is Jason your Tom?” She asks. It takes a moment for me to understand what she is asking.

“Yeah.” I say nodding. “Yeah he is” I repeat, turning my head to look at him again. 

“Move Howard. Emily’s dinner is ready.” Mark orders and makes me jump. I nod and get out of his way, by going into the living room. Despite Emily's protests to make me stay and talk for longer. 

Jay is too into his dancing for me to get any conversation out of him. And Gary will be grouchy if I interrupt his piano playing. So instead I decide to grab my headphones and listen to some music for a while. I sit on a couple of steps, where I can see everything going on. Secretly admiring Jay. Thinking. I haven't done much thinking lately about my feelings. I tend to not think too much, God knows where I would go if I overthought everything. 

The song I am writing at the moment is probably the most beautiful thing I have ever written alone. I've named it ‘What is Love’ and the main thing that inspired me to write it was Jason. Mostly because my thoughts about him always seem to have a melodic feel to them. And it wasn't difficult to come up with words to say. 

At the moment, I listen to a couple of tracks I have constructed on the dj equipment I found in the school. As my friends suspected, I am pretty good at creating ‘them sick beats’ as Rob calls them. 

During the best bit on the track, I notice Jay stop dancing and walk over to Gary. They start talking about something, probably the tune that Gaz is playing on the piano. I feel slightly jealous of the two, laughing and smiling. So I jump over there and get as close as I can to Jason, putting my headphones on his head. He looks surprised and immediately starts to bop his head to the beat. 

“This is good!” He says enthusiastically, quite overwhelmed with pride that his best friend created this track. 

I smile at him, thankful that he likes it. I take the headphones off of him and place them back around my neck.

“Jayy” says Gaz as he pokes Jay in the back. “Can I chat with you for a minute?” He stands up and motions for Jase to follow him. 

“Alright” Jason replies, rolling his eyes as he walks past me. Making me stifle a laugh. 

“I’M HO-O-OME.” I hear Rob exclaim happily from the entrance. I assume Mark will greet him, so I resume listening to my music. 

A couple of minutes later, after I have fully drifted into the music, Jay interrupts me by running his hand down my spine. Which causes me to instantly jump and shiver as I turn to see what he wants.

He motions for me to take my headphones off, so I do and listen to what he wants to tell me.

I am quite disappointed when he tells me that Mark needs me in the kitchen. I assumed there would be something more interesting to do or talk about by the way he got my attention back there.

I nod silently and make my way to the kitchen. Where Mark has once again, lost control of everything. Emily is making a mess of the table and her food, the phone is ringing constantly and he is attempting to cook 3 different meals at once.

I pick up the phone and stir the contents of one of the pans as he rushes over to help Rob put the shopping away.

The phone conversations are pretty boring, a couple of people ring up, asking what time to come to the apartment. So I assume we are having a party, ignoring what Gary’s uncle said. Better make sure nothing gets out of hand though, Emily will be sleeping under the same roof.

“This is disgusting.” I state as I taste the contents of the pan, after the phone has stopped ringing.

“What do you expect when I have to do everything around here?” Mark asks rhetorically, more than a little pissed off. But bless him, he keeps a smiling face just for little Emily.

“Bed now Em.” He says to her, kneeling so he is at her level. I observe the scene as the two have a battle on whether she should go to sleep yet. Which I can see Mark is losing, rapidly.

“Fine. How about…. Er…. Howard reads you a story!” Mark offers to her suddenly. 

“Yey!!!” she exclaims happily and immediately skips over to me. I roll my eyes at Mark and tell him to carry on with the cooking.

“Come on then.” I say softly and she leads me away from the kitchen. But she stops suddenly, just before we reach the corridor of bedrooms. She looks up at me with an excited expression.

“Can Jason read a story too?” She asks, bouncing on her toes, eager to hear my answer.

“Go ask him.” I reply with a smile. She squeals and bounds off in his direction. Looks like she is as happy to be in his company as I am. If not more.

As I assumed, she returned with Jason. But rather than her skipping off in front of him, he is carrying her and she has a massive grin on her face. I can’t help but smile at how easily the little one had managed to get him to carry her and read her a story.

Me and him exchange a look and go off down the corridor to find out what story she wants us to read.


	23. Chapter 23

“So what would you like me to read?” Jay asks her as he tucks her into her bed, (after she has got into her pjs and had a wash.) I took the opportunity to stand back and watch the two, from beside the doorframe. Knowing that from the start, little Emily would immediately prefer Jay’s company to my own. 

“Can you make a new one?” She asks him as he sits by her feet.

“About what?” He questions.

“Friends. Like you and Howard. I want to know if my friend Tom is definitely my best friend.” she explains. It looks like they both have completely forgotten I was invited to read her a story. But i’m interested in what Jay has to say about our friendship. So I refrain from leaving the doorpost.

“Well, the way you know if someone is your best friend. Is when you can trust them and rely on them to never leave or let you down. You can be comfortable around them and they won’t judge you for being yourself. They know you, inside and out. And I know that How is my best friend because, he always makes me laugh, he cares about me and he is ultimately the most amazing person I have ever met.” He explains to her. After every word he said, my emotions just began to soar. 

“And what is most important.” I say, stepping into the bedroom, startling both Jason and Emily. Jason's expression is like a rabbit in headlights. He's probably thinking that he shouldn't have said what he did. But it's all more than okay. And I let him know by standing beside where he sits and putting a hand on his head, where I gently mess around with his hair as I carry on my point. “Is that the other person thinks of you in the same way.” I say. 

 

Once Emily is satisfied with our best friend story, we leave the room. I was going to have a quick chat with Jay about what he said and if he really meant it. But as soon as we get out of the room, he speed walks back into the living room, where the others are. 

_ So did he not mean what he said back then? _ I think to myself as I follow him. 

“Dougie. Come sit.” Mark exclaims as soon as I enter the room. He motions to the seat next to him and opposite Jay. I sit and begin to eat my pasta, whilst occasionally joining in on the group conversation. Which is about Rob's experience at the local tesco. I wasn't even sure they had tescos in Spain. 

“You're awfully quiet Jase. What's up?” Gaz suddenly stops the conversation. We all look at him, waiting for an answer, as we have all noticed his silence. 

He picks at his pasta and refuses to look at us. 

“Nothing. Just thinkin.” He replies. None of us really believe him, but telepathically we decided it's not worth pushing him to tell us. 


	24. Chapter 24

After we had all finished our dinner, people started turning up at the apartment and the music soon turned up. The entire apartment immediately turned into a full on party zone, other than the bedroom corridor. Which we placed a sofa in front, just to keep our guests from accidentally waking up Emily.

I’m not entirely sure how Gary knew so many people from around here to invite, possibly he had met them at times before.

Anyway, Gaz is spending most of his time playing the piano for the guests. The rest of us have been dancing and singing karaoke for most of the night. Also, Rob and Mark are taking it in turns to be the other’s wingman, to pick up as many girls as possible. Though many I have noticed so far, seem put off by Rob wearing a skirt. I don’t see a problem with that, anyone looks good in a skirt or dress. 

Jase is casually chatting with people, telling them stories and ranting about anything at all. I’ve been watching him closely tonight, making sure he is definitely ok after his mood at dinner. He seems to be doing fine though. So I take the opportunity to have a couple of drinks and get to know some of the people here.

“Lookie there, Markie has scored again!” One of the girls beside me says, motioning to the small man, getting very close with a tall brunette. I laugh as I see Rob stand beside the two, looking on at the scene. He looks so heartbroken, aw poor Rob. I wouldn’t be surprised if he has a man-crush on Markie.

“Looks like Jay’s getting some too!” One of my new mates exclaims a couple of minutes after. I immediately stop the conversation I am having with a couple other people. And look around the room to where he is supposedly ‘getting some’. 

Something inside my chest drops as I focus my sight on a shorter blonde woman advancing on him. Pushing him back against the wall as he smiles one of his million dollar smiles. Then they kiss. I feel betrayed, I thought he was beginning to show some affection back to me. I’ve not been betrayed, but led on. I feel ashamed that my feelings have been shown clearly on my face, in front of my new friends. 

“Excuse me.” I say to them as I get up and head for the bathroom. Where I intend to re-think all this, without fear of being judged by others.

I open the door and wipe my face over with my hand, only to notice a fully naked couple… in the bathtub. I mutter an apology before closing the door again.  _ Hold on, what if Emily were to walk in there?  _ I think to myself. This party can’t carry on.

 

“We need to end the party.” I say bluntly to Gary, once I find him, still sitting by the piano.

“Why?” He asks, playing a couple of chords.

“Things are getting a little… inappropriate.” I explain, hoping he wouldn’t ask for details.

“What? The other week at the club, you said the best part of the party is when everyone gets together and things get a little out of hand.” He uses my previous words against me. I sigh.

“Yeh I know, but that’s at a club. This is your uncle’s house where your 7 year old cousin is sleeping. And there is a naked couple in the bathtub!” 

“Jeez How, okay. I will tell everyone to go.” He gives in and tells a couple of people around him to tell everyone the party's over. He turns back to me suddenly. “Are you feeling okay?” He asks, looking concerned.

“No.” I say bluntly “I just need a lie down.” I continue, before heading off down the bedroom corridor and to the spare room. Which I should be sharing with Jay.

Once I shut the door, I flop onto the double bed, taking up as much room as possible. Which is pretty much the entire bed, thanks to my tallness.

_ Maybe I should leave Jason a little more room. He has trouble sleeping at the best of times. _ I think to myself. 

_ You know what. Fuck him.  _ I think again. Deciding to fall asleep as I am. 

Just before I entirely fade into my dreams, a little voice in my head says  _ You wish. _


	25. Chapter 25

The next morning I wake, surprised that the sunlight isn’t blinding me, the curtains have been shut. Also a thin blanket has been placed over me and my headphones lie on the bedside drawers (I had slept with them still around my neck.)

Once my eyes have adapted to the light of the room, I also notice a cup of coffee and a note beside it. I pick up the note and squint at it, reading what is says:

_ Mornin How, _

_ Sorry if your coffee is cold, I woke up at a stupid hour again (the sofa didn’t help.)  _

_ Gone for a walk. I left you and the guys some bacon in the fridge.  _

_ Love, Jay x _

_ Ps. Don’t mess up my clothes when you get yours from the drawers.  _

From the moment I finish reading the note, I know that I cannot stay mad at him. And that I have no legitimate reason to be mad at him. Because he hasn’t done anything wrong, it is just me, getting jealous whenever he is in the company of anyone else.

I read over the last piece of the note:  _ Love, Jay x _

It sturrs some form of butterflies in my stomach, pleased with the words and ever so slightly nervous. 

I know now, that I may have a bit of a man crush on him. Whether it is an actual crush, I don’t know, only time will tell.

 

We manage to clean up the apartment in time, just before Gary’s uncle returns. Once he entered the room he began snooping around the apartment, searching for any evidence that we had a party. As soon as he stops searching he chucks some keys at Gary.

“For the hotel you are staying at.” He explains. 

“I thought we were staying here for the week?” Gary questions. His uncle shakes his head furiously. 

“No no. Just last night, you may say goodbye to Emily, then pack your bags and be off to the hotel.” He dismisses and heads to his own room. We all look at each other sadly, a little disappointed that we won’t be staying in this luxury apartment any longer. Though I smirk as I imagine Jason’s face when we tell him that he unpacked and arranged for nothing. He hasn’t returned from his walk yet. 

 

We arrive at the hotel that we will now be staying at, turns out that Gary’s uncle paid for us all to have a room each! Good quality ones too, with beach views and near enough luxury furniture. 

Once we have put all our luggage in our rooms, we meet in the hotel lobby. 

“What are we planning for today?” Gaz asks us. 

“We have all week to do what we want. I say we go out and see what happens.” Robbie suggests enthusiastically. 

“I like the sound of that!” Mark agrees with his best mate. 

“I'm going to visit the herbal place down the road then relax here for the day. I don't feel like going out today.” Jason tells us. 

“Okay. Cmon lads let’s goooo.” Gary leads the party out of the hotel. Leaving Jase still sitting by the table, by himself. I turn back from the door and walk over to Jason. 

“You want some company?” I ask him. Sitting back beside him. He looks at me with a well covered nervous expression. 

“I’m alright. You can go have fun with them, I’ll probably bore you with what i’ve got planned.” He tells me, shifting in his seat.

“Jase, you could literally ramble on about anything for the entire day, and I wouldn’t get bored.” I say truthfully. It’s weirdly interesting watching him talk so passionately and knowingly about something.

“Thanks How.” He shoots me a thankful smile and puts his hand on top of mine, rested on the table. “It means a lot.” he adds. My body goes entirely stiff as he keeps his hand placed on mine. He seems to notice, as he looks slightly amused and he messes around with my hand. Gently stroking it or intertwining our fingers.

I seem to have lost the ability to speak, move or even think properly.  _ Jason, Why, Confused, Why, Help, Gah, Jay,  _ Are the only words that float around my thoughts.

“W-Whaat?” Is all I manage to say, I hope that is enough for him to realise he needs to give me answers. Straight best mates don’t do this, right?

“Let’s get going to the store, I don’t want all the good stuff to be gone.” He replies with a far too amused expression. Jase lets go of my hand and starts walking towards the door, with his natural dancer style stride. “C’mon.” He stops when he realises I haven’t even stood up yet.

I attempt to say something like “Okay.” but it just comes out as a murmur.


	26. Chapter 26

We went down to the herbal store like he wanted. Jase spent most of the time prancing around, chucking all types of tea and nuts in the trolley. Which I pushed around, following him, still completely captivated.

We return to the hotel and he immediately goes off to his room, so I go to mine as well.

The hotel that we are staying at sorta reminds me of those dorm rooms that you see in the movies, with the big corridor and loads of young adults staying in them. I haven’t seen one person in this hotel that is over the age of 30.

A couple of minutes later, I hear the sound of an acoustic guitar being strummed. I poke my head out of the door to see Jason sitting in the hallway, with his back against the wall, his guitar on his lap. 

I grab some of the beers that I bought from the store and go out into the corridor and sit opposite him. Admiring the way he idly strums chords and melodies. Moments pass and he finally seems to notice that I too am in the corridor, though thinking about it, he more than likely noticed my presence as soon as I opened the door. 

“Gaz was talking with me yesterday.” he states. I recall when he asked Jase, quite seriously, to talk to him privately.

“What did he want to say?” I ask, interested as to why he would bring up their private conversation.

He tells me:

_ “So, what’s up Gaz?”  _

_ “What’s going on with you and Howard?” he asks.  _

_ “What do you mean?” _

_ “You two seem… close.” _

_ “He’s my best mate, what else would you expect.” _

_ “No, not like that. Me, Markie and Rob have noticed other things.” _

_ “Like what?” _

_ “The way you look at each other, you smile at each other like no one else is there and it’s almost like you have conversations without even talking. Also, ever since he joined our group, you spend all your time with him. The rest of us don’t see you unless he’s there too.” _

“I didn’t really know what to say after that, so I left.” Jason explains, with an expression that I can’t read, which worries me.

“Is that why you were acting funny all night? Y’know, after I finished your story for Emily.” I ask, it all seems to be falling into place now.

“Yeah.” He pauses, debating whether he should continue talking. “It’s why I kissed that girl as well.” He pauses again, waiting for my reaction, which is only more confused than before. “I did it because everything sorta hit me. What you said, what Gary said, our entire friendship. It scared me, so I freaked out.” He explains, looking almost ashamed.

“Why did it scare you?” I ask.

“Because it’s all true, what you said, Gary said, our friendship. It seemed so complicated.” 

“It is true. But it’s not complicated, which is what makes us work so well.” I smile at him, hoping to make him feel a little better.

“So we’re ‘us’ now?” he smirks suddenly.

“I suppose, we’ve always been ‘us’. Gary did say that ever since I showed up, you haven’t gone anywhere without me.” I joke. Glad that the serious part of the conversation has passed and now we can discuss the way we usually discuss.

“Hey, I go to the Apollo without you.” He counters, with an amused expression.

“Oh really? You only go when you know i’ll be there. Admit it, you only go to impress me.” I say with a playful tone.

“It depends, are you impressed?” He asks with an equally impish tone.

“Always. You never fail to impress me.” 

“Are you flirting with me, again. Have you got something you’d like to share with the class?” He questions, motioning to the 4 beer bottles, 2 empty and 2 full. I laugh and think of what to say. 

“Yes sir, I have something i’d like to tell.” I say stifling a laugh.

“Please don’t call me sir if this is going to be about me.” Jase giggles.

“I’d like to tell that I am very fond of you.” I share, hoping that Jason won’t become serious and worried. But thankfully his expression becomes sort of smug.

“Is that your way of saying that you love me?” He asks.

“Yes.” I say simply, trying my best not to blush. He falls silent and his expression changes again, like it does when he is overthinking something.  _ Shit. _ I immediately think.  _ Well done Howard, you’ve gone and fucked it upppp.  _ I mentally slow clap. 

 

A full minute of silence passes and I can feel that there won’t be any more conversation between us, till the end of the day at least. So, I grab one of the remaining full bottles of beer, leaving one for Jay. Before standing up and walking back to my room. I can feel his eyes on me, and I sort of expect him to come running up to me, like the cliche movies. But he doesn’t. So I shut the door and flop onto my bed, hoping that I didn’t just completely fuck up our friendship. 


	27. Chapter 27

_ Me-Markie, I’ve completely fucked it up.  _

_ Mark-Whats up Dougie? _

_ Me-I told Jay I love him, not actually ‘I love you’ but he asked if what I said meant that I love him and I said yes and I’ve messed up everything _

_ Mark-Hold on for a second. _

_ Me-Okay _

_ Mark-Sorry, just had to tell the lads, Rob want’s to give you advice. _

_ Me-Fine, what’s Rob’s advice? _

_ Rob-Mate, he totally loves you, get off your ass, go over to his room and kiss him.  _

_ Gaz-Nonono, that wouldn’t do anything for Jay.  _

_ Mark-Are you saying that Howard isn’t up to Jason’s standard? _

_ Gaz-I don’t know what his standard is! I didn’t realise he was gay until yesterday! _

_ Rob-Wait, he’s gay?  _

_ Mark-Yeah, he told me last year. _

_ Rob-Can I go kiss him if Dougie won’t? ;) _

_ Gaz-Ffs Rob.  _

_ Mark-Why would you want to kiss him anyway?  _

_ Rob-Have you seeeeeeeen Jay? Who wouldn’t want to, admit it. If you had to go gay for one of us, 100% chance we’d all choose him. _

_ Gaz-You’re too invested in this, and it’s scaring me. _

_ Mark-I think in order, I would kiss: Rob, Gaz, Jay then How. Sorry Dougie. xD _

_ Rob-Thank yah Markie m’dear. I’d go: Myself, Jay, Markie, Gaz then How. Sorryyy Howarddd. xD _

_ Me-None taken. I don’t particularly dream about kissin you lot either. I’d go: Jay, Markie, Rob, Gaz.  _

_ Rob-Howarddd? Gazzzzzzzzzzz? Pls can I kiss Jay if Howard don’t? _

_ Gaz-Ffs. We are really living up to the stereotype of boybands being gay af.  _

_ Mark-Calm down Gaz. ⅘ of the band are still allegedly straight.  _

_ Rob-How many do you reckon Jay’s had? I mean he’s like 19, surely he’s done it with some blokes. _

_ Mark-Idk, if he’s anything like you, he would have had half of Manchester by now. _

_ Rob-R.U.D.E _

_ Me-Oooo Burnnn. _

_ Gaz-I reckon like 10+.  _

_ Mark-Tru Tru, if he can get them like he gets the ladies.  _

_ Rob-I BET £10 ON 17 _

_ Mark-£10 ON 11 _

_ Gaz-£10 ON 8 _

_ Me-£10 ON 5 _

_ Jay-Hey guys… _

_ Gaz-Oh hi Jay! _

_ Mark-... smooth… _

_ Rob-...awkward… XD _

_ Me-I thought you didn’t have a phone. _

_ Jay-Mum lent me one. Looks like I won’t be giving it back. _

_ Rob-MARKIE U WANNA GO TO THE BEACH, LETS GO NOW BAIIII _

_ Mark-KK BAIII _

_ Gaz-I’M COMING TOO BAIII _

_ Jay-...  _

_ Me-Jase, i’m sorry for saying it. I didn’t mean to freak you out. _

_ Jay-You didn’t say it. So I don’t have an excuse to be freaking out. _

_ Me-It’s totally understandable. _


	28. Chapter 28

After 5 minutes of no reply, I decide to go over there. I knock on the door and it opens immediately, almost as if he was waiting for me to turn up there. 

“We need to talk.” I say, trying not to show any emotions that may cause him to close the door in my face. He motions for me to come into the room, so I do, and I sit down on the edge of the bed. Once he has shut the door, he perches himself on the edge of the desk in the room.

“I’m not pissed at you by the way, for the messages in the groupchat.” he tells me. “I’m a little annoyed that you didn’t stand up for me. But we have other things to talk about.”

“Jase i’m really sorr-” I begin to apologise again, but he cuts me off.

“No. Let me speak.” He interrupts and I nod, allowing him to continue. “I wasn’t expecting you to be serious when you said yes. Which is why I was so surprised. I should have said something then, but I felt like I couldn’t speak. So, I will tell you what I wanted to say now.” he pauses, taking a breath “When we became friends I felt like I needed to be near you and talk to you as much as possible. And when I completely ditched the 4 of you, I felt so alone and depressed, because I missed my friends and mostly you. Even though we had only been in each others company for 8 hours. Ever since then, I realised that we were going to become more than friends. Best friends, maybe even more than that. I knew this because like I said to Emily, you know me, care about me and I feel the same about you. Which like you said is the most important thing.” he pauses again, seemingly re-thinking what he is going to say next. “So… what I really wanted to say, before rambling on, is: I love you too.” He finishes, looking proud of himself yet also a little worried, as he looks hopefully at me. 

My heart skips a beat and I feel like I could cry right now. I stand up and walk over to him, getting as close to him as I can. I look straight into his eyes to make sure that I'm doing the right thing. The way his eyes glisten tell me that I am. So, I lean forwards and capture his lips with a kiss. I can feel him smile against my lips as he wraps his arms around my neck. I do the same by wrapping my arms around his waist. He smiles again and deepens the kiss, before looking me in the eyes again mischievously. 

He pushes me towards the bed and climbs on top of me, before kissing me again. I kiss back and slide his shirt off, discarding it on the floor. 

At this point I am the most excited that I have ever felt in my life, running my hands over his chest and back. 

But suddenly there is a loud knock on the door. Jay slowly separates from me, with a pissed off expression. The knocks continue and get louder. So he pecks me once more before rolling off of me and striding towards the door. I am sort of paying attention to what's going on, but I am too over the moon about what just happened.

I look over at the door and watch Jase open it. The moment he opens it, Rob jumps through the doorway and kisses Jay. Who jumps back and slaps him, not realising who it is. 

“Rob?” He questions. I get up and walk over to them, standing behind Jay, giving Rob a disapproving glare. 

“I did say that if Dougie wouldn't come over here, then I would.” He tells us with a smirk. 

“I am so pissed off with you right now.” Jason replies. 

“You know you love me really.” Rob puts on a puppy dog face. Mark and Gaz turn up behind him at this moment. 

“You didn't…” Gaz states. 

“He did…” Markie states “High five!” The two high five. 

“We are definitely the straightest band in Manchester.” Gary mutters. Making all of us laugh, including Jay. 

“We are really sorry about betting money on how many blokes you have slept with.” Mark says, becoming shy and a little worried. Jase takes a moment to think of what to say.  

“It's fine, I forgive you all. But Bob, I'm expecting you to buy me an ice cream later.” He smirks. I put my head on Jay’s shoulder and wrap my arms around his stomach area. 

“Can you get me one too?” I ask. 

“I KNEW IT!” Markie squeals happily and whacks Rob and Gaz on the arms. Gaz rolls his eyes and Rob begins to look as happy as Mark.

“Congrats mate! I didn’t think you’d have the balls to take my advice.” Rob says to me, smiling widely.

“Do you two want to come down to the beach with us? We were on our way down there, but Rob wanted to come here first.” Gary asks, changing the subject.

“Yeah we will go as well.” Jason smiles, I grin at him answering for the both of us. We leave the room and start walking down to the elevator after Jay grabs his shirt, putting it back on and locks the door.

“Is the Mrs answering for the couple now?” Robbie jokes.

“Hey! Why am I the woman?” Jase asks.

“Cus you’d look good in a dress and you are a delicate little flower.” I tease. He bumps into my shoulder playfully.

“I will take that as a compliment. But, I reckon you would look pretty decent in a dress too.” He replies with a smirk.

“Are we gonna have to listen to their flirting everyday from now?” Gary grunts to Mark.

“We were already listening to it everyday before now”


	29. Chapter 29

A little while later we arrive at the beach, after waiting for Rob to rent a pair of rollerskates. This is a neat beach, compared to the ones in England.  

As expected there are loads of people, playing volleyball, sunbathing and swimming. 

“Race you to the water.” Mark shouts to me, already beginning to sprint towards the sea. I race after him and put in all my effort to catch him, but he wins. He celebrates his victory by kicking the seawater up at me, soaking my shirt. 

I swear at him whilst laughing, before taking my shirt off and tying it around my waist. Me and Mark discuss what we should do next, whilst waiting for the others to catch up with us.

“We should play volleyball! I bet a bunch of cute girls would wanna play.” I suggest. Noticing a couple of groups of girls. 

“Isn't Jase meant to be your one and only?” Mark laughs, but nodding at the idea. 

“He is! Doesn't mean I can't help you lot though.” 

“Sound like a plan. I bet Rob will be more than happy for you to play wingman. He got no girls last night, at alllllll.” Mark laughs, sliding off his shoes, so that he can paddle his feet in the water. I do the same and get ready to shiver as my bare feet enter the water. BUT ITS WARM, THE SEA IS WARM! It blows my mind, seawater in Britain is freezing cold 100% of the time. 

“ITS WARM!” I exclaim to the shorter man, who also has the same amazed expression on his face. 

“WE NEED TO BUY SOME FLOATS!” Mark exclaims back, pointing to one of the seaside stalls with various inflatable rings and floats.

“YES! Race you there!” I smirk, getting a head start. Attempting to sprint across the sand in bare feet. We run past the other three, who are still halfway to the sea, walking as slow as slow. Probably because Rob attempted to roller skate on sand. 

 

“This one.” I hold up a bright rubber ring. We have been to several stalls, buying things for the other lads, still trying to find a suitable inflatable float. 

“Nah. This.” Mark grabs a floral rubber ring. 

“Hold onto your shorts.” I gasp, noticing the most amazing float in existence: a giant banana which can hold around 5-6 people. I grab the massive float and ask the owner of the stall whether we can buy it already inflated. He said yes, so we grab an end each and carry it down the beach, to where our mates have borrowed a couple of deck chairs. Thankfully there is little wind, so we aren't being blown away like Mary Poppins. 

“Are you being serious! You bought that!” Gaz is surprised as we place the float beside them. We nod proudly. 

“This is perfection!” Robbie exclaims, flopping onto the massive banana. 

“Cmon lads let's try it out!” Jase says excitedly taking off his boots. We all exclaim “Yeah!!” Other than Gary who says:

“I will stay here and watch the shoes”

So we run off into the sea without him, all holding onto the banana. Me and Rob on one side, Jay and Markie on the other side. We get deep enough into the sea, so it's up to our chests (well not Mark’s, he's holding onto the float so tight, so that he doesn't go under the water.) Thankfully the water is pretty calm, so the waves aren't swaying us around much at all. 

“We could be on baywatch! The way we ran down here.” I joke once we stop walking. Making the other three laugh, imagining us running into the water to save someone from drowning, in slow mo, with some majestic music and the massive banana. 

With a little help from each other, we all manage to get onto the float and sturdy ourselves. 

“Weee!” Robbie exclaims, putting his arms in the air as the tide pushes us in slightly. 

“We didn't think about how to move it, did we?” Markie asks me. I shake my head. Becoming a little disappointed. “Is that Gaz?” he then asks, pointing to a jet ski hurtling towards us. It doesn't take long for us to find out it is, and he has a solution for our problem. We hand him the rope that's connected to the front piece of the banana, and he attaches it to the back of the jet ski. 

Soon we are surfing the waves on the banana float, holding on tightly as Gary pulls us around the bay on his jet ski. 

Mark screams behind me as he accidentally lets go, nearly falling off. But he reacts by grabbing onto me, nearly pulling me off. Making me scream as well. Suddenly Mark falls off and drags me with him. As we return to the surface of the water, we erupt with laughter. 

“What happened?” I ask, mid-laugh. 

“Robbie shoved me!” He explains, wiping his hair from his face, also mid-laugh. 

Gary pulls the banana float back around to where we land, to see if we are okay. But there is only one person remaining on the float. 

“I shoved Rob off for yah.” Jason tells us, an amused smirk on his face, as he pulls us both back onto the float. We then go find Robbie and help him on too. Before continuing along the bay. 


	30. Chapter 30

After a couple of hours, we leave the banana float by our deck chairs and shoes, then go mess around in the sea. Mark and Rob have brought a couple of snorkels, so they are using them. Jason was messing with them, by putting water down their breathing tubes. But, someone has started playing some loud music, not too far up the beach. So Jay, being Jay, has started dancing to the music. He seems to be getting lost in it, dancing with his feet in the water like no one else is on the beach, which is adorable. I take the opportunity to join in and do a couple of backflips. He notices me dancing too and smiles.

“You wanna go play some volleyball? There's no one on that court up there.” I ask him, pointing to the volleyball net up the beach.

“Yeah! I will go get the others” he smiles widely and runs into the sea to where Rob and Markie are snorkelling. I go to the deck chairs to get Gaz to come play a match with us.

Once we have gathered our friends, we race up the beach. I grab the volleyball which has been left here.

“Shall we do 2 vs 2, the other person scoring?” I suggest. They all nod and we start the first game, Mark and Jay vs Gaz and me. Me and Gary win, mainly because Gaz has suddenly became very competitive, because he has noticed a cute blonde girl watching him. Next match is Mark and Rob vs Me and Gaz. We lose this match because Gary was trying to hard and got hit in the face by Rob hitting the ball at full speed. Which we all admit is hilarious because the girl he was trying to impress burst out laughing as well. So he goes off to score, swapping with Jay. We are winning, but then it all goes tits up.

Rob hits the ball low so Jase dives onto the sand to return it. He does and it goes back over the net. Mark then quickly returns it back. I run to it, not looking where I am going, tripping over Jason who hasn't got up yet. So, I go tumbling to the floor and the other two win. We all laugh at what just happened. I stand up and give Jay a hand up, pulling him into a hug and giving him a kiss on the cheek. Apologising for standing on him.

“Hey Howard?” He says, a little seriously, pulling away from the hug. Which immediately makes me think I've done something wrong.

“Yeah? What's wrong?” I ask.

“I don't feel comfortable doing all this in public.” He explains, motioning to where I kissed him on the cheek.

“Oh okay. Sorry.” I apologise feeling saddened, as I quite like showing people affection wherever.

“Hey.” He tips my head up so I'm looking at him. “I will make it up to you later.” He continues with a wink. I blush and immediately feel better.

“Are you two done yet? We want to go get some dinner.” Rob shouts over to us, amused. We nod and we all go on the hunt for some good food to eat.

 

Jay, being his healthy eating self, insisted we eat in the best curry house in Barcelona. Having a love for curries, all of us agreed and now here we sit, waiting for our food.

Whilst we've been sitting here, I've noticed the blonde girl and her friends (that were watching us play volleyball) are also in here waiting for their dinner.

Every time I look over at her, she blushes or giggles. I decide to go over there and sit with them, to see if she could be a match for Gary. Hopefully I won't be flirted with.

“Hello ladies, can I sit?” I ask, motioning to the free seat. All of the girls giggle and nod. So I take a seat.

“What's your name?” One of them asks me.

“Howard. What are yours?” I ask the three of them.

“I'm Dawn, this is Ayda and Emma.” The blonde one tells me. I nod, going over their names in my head.

“I couldn't help noticing you lot checking out my friends earlier.” I say to them. Dawn moves closer to me, putting a hand on my shoulder, then running a finger down my neck.

“We were. Did you get jealous we weren't all over you?” She asks with a mischievous smile. Before I can answer, I notice Jay standing beside the table.

“Mind if I sit?” He asks, without a tinge of emotion. He is clearly pissed off and thinks that I'm enjoying these girls being nice to me. I'm not really, I feel like I'm betraying him already.

“Of course, the more the merrier.” Emma smiles at him. He takes a seat next to Ayda, opposite me. His eyes briefly look at my hand which is resting on the table, he seems to be having an argument with himself again. He suddenly snaps out of it and grabs my hand, lacing our fingers together. I smile stupidly at the small gesture, him getting all protective and possessive. The three girls look at each other with a concerned expression.

“Shit, I'm so sorry. I didn't realise.” Dawn says quickly, removing her hand from my shoulder.

“Don't worry about it.” Jase replies, with an accepting smile. “You can't have this guy, but we may have a guy for each of you. If you're interested.”

 

“You’re from Manchester? AND A DANCER?” Gary asks Dawn. After we introduce him to the beautiful blonde, they immediately got into conversation. Gary mainly listening and watching her intently, absolutely amazed how a girl like her would be interested in meeting him.

“Yes I am.” she smiles widely at him “I’ve heard you’re quite a singer.” she shoots a wink at Gary before smiling at me and Jay.

“Well, I sing and play keyboards-” Gary begins to explain enthusiastically. Everything is going well with them.

I look over at Mark and Rob, noticing the two of them still sit next to each other, sharing conversation between themselves and the two girls. Neither of them really wanting to leave the other to get to know one of the girls better. They are best friends, so I’m sure they will both want to know the girls as well as each other.

 

 

“So what did you think of Dawn?” I ask Gary on the way back to our rooms, slinging my arm over his shoulder with a smile. He looks at me with the most massive grin and his face lights up. 

“She's amazing, Dougie. Absolutely amazing.” He tells cheerfully. 

“You could have had her if you wanted.” Jay smirks playfully at me. 

“I know. But I'd rather have you.” I smile, jabbing him in the side. 

“Get a room Jesus Christ.” Gary laughs as we reach the corridor of our rooms. Rob and Mark decided to stay in town for a couple more hours, so it's just the three of us. 

“We will don't worry.” I shoot Jay a impish look. Making him laugh and blush a little bit. “Actually screw that. Come here.” I notice no one else is in the corridor, so I pull Jason over and kiss him, wrapping my arms around his waist. 

“Never mind byeeee.” I hear Gary exclaim and start to run down the corridor. 

Jason starts to laugh at our friend’s reaction, resting his forehead on my shoulder. 

“Do you reckon he's ever going to get used to this?” He asks me, with a little giggle. 

“Probably not.” I reply, gently caressing his neck. 

“Do you want to go back to my room?” Jay ask, raising his head to look me in the eyes. 

“That'd be nice.” I smile before cupping his cheeks and pecking him quickly. He holds my hand and leads me down the corridor to his room, knocking on Gary's door on the way then running into Jay's room so that Gary doesn't see us. 

We laugh as we hear Gary open his door and swear at ‘the bloody kids’. But, then I glance over at Jay and I know what's going down. He steps close to me, our noses brushing and I can feel his breath. But as I lean in to kiss him, he pulls away with a massive smirk. 

“You tease.” I smirk as well, raising my hands and putting them in his hair. Before running them through it. Causing him to moan unexpectedly. He now looks surprised, embarrassed and more mischievous all at once. 

“Did you like that by any chance?” I ask, incredibly amused.

“Mmm yes.” He purrs before getting a little closer to me again. I don't wait this time, and capture his lips with my own. He slips his hands up my shirt and caresses the sides of my torso. Whilst I smirk and put my hands in his hair again, now knowing the effect. 

But, whilst he's got his hand on my side, he accidentally finds a ticklish spot. Making me squirm and fall on the bed, with him unexpectedly falling on top of me.   


 

By the end of the week in Spain, several promises were made: Dawn promised Gary that she would meet up with him when they both get back to Manchester, and in return Gary promised to sing for her, not any song, but one for her. Rob and Mark promised each other that no matter how close they get to the girls (or any girl), they will always have each other’s back.

Jay and myself? We made too many promises, so many that I can’t count them. Even so, I hold every one of them close to my heart. Almost as close as Jason is to my heart.


	31. Chapter 31

I look at my phone before we board the plane and I notice a message from my mum. 

_ We have a big surprise for you when you get back.  _

A surprise! What could it be? I haven't asked for anything. 

While we are on the plane I decide to tell the guys. Mainly to get spread my excitement and stop Jason worrying about the plane possibly catching fire. 

“A stripper?” Rob asks genuinely. Mark whacks him in the arm. 

“No way would she get him a stripper. This is How’s mum we are talking about. It's gotta be something really helpful and from the heart.” Mark says. That's really sweet of him, I'm going to tell her that when I get back. 

“A dj set?” Gary questions. 

“That wouldn't be a proper surprise. It's most likely something I wouldn't even think of getting.” I reply. 

“Once again. A stripper.” Rob giggles to himself. 

“A puppy? That's a sweet surprise.” Suggest Jay. Who suddenly tenses up at the plane making a small turn. Rob and Mark merge into a conversation about my mother as I turn fully to face Jay. Ignoring their conversation, which will more than likely turn rude at some point. 

“You okay mate?” I ask softly. 

“Yeh.” He replies. But I don't believe him for a moment.

“Do you want to hold my hand again?” I ask with an amused smile. He nods vigorously, though he seems to take back that action immediately by going a bit red. Which only makes me grin wider and dramatically place my hand infront of him. He looks at me gratefully as he puts his hand in mine and we entwine our fingers together. It would have been a more romantic moment, if he wasn't crushing my fingers to calm down his worrying. 


	32. Chapter 32

We arrive back in Manchester Airport and my dad picks us all up in his big people carrier. After only just managing to fit all our luggage in the car, we pile into the car. We drop all the guys off at their separate houses, before heading back to our own house. But, we drive past it instead of pulling up in the drive.

“Where are we going?” I ask my dad, giving him a confused yet excited look.

“Home” He states. I become even more confused. Did we move house when I was away? Surely they would have told me.

We soon pull up at some apartment building just off Mancunian Way. Dad gets out of the car and tells me to follow him with my luggage. To which I silently nod and give him another confused glance.

We climb the stairs to the third floor of the building, where my dad knocks on one of the doors. He looks at me excitedly, with a big smile.

My mum opens the door and has the exact same smile on her face.

“Welcome home!” she exclaims happily and pulls me into the apartment with a hug. 

“I don’t understand.” I state, taking in my surroundings. If we all have moved house, into this small apartment, they surely wouldn’t be this hyped up.

“This is your surprise! We thought as your older brothers have moved out, you would want your own space too. We have been planning it for a while and this apartment is just down the road from your job.” Dad explains.

“Also, this place isn’t too far away from our house and your mate’s!” Mum continues, her smile growing as they tell me the surprise.

“So, this is my apartment?” I ask, beginning to feel equally as excited, they nod. “And you have done it up?” I ask, hoping that I wouldn’t have to re-decorate. 

“Yep. And we have moved all your belongings here. As well as some basic things to get you going, like a tv, pots and pans, a fridge; all that.” Mum tells me.

“How did you afford it?” I ask them, slightly surprised. Considering the amount of money we came here with.

“Our new jobs pay a lot better, and what you were earning. Also, your nan, Colin and Michael chipped in a little.”

“Wow! Thank you so much!” I smile widely at them both and give them both a massive hug. “This is amazing!”

“I knew you would love it! Let me show you around the house.” Mum grabs my arm and pulls me in the direction of the kitchen. I turn my head at dad, who is rolling his eyes and laughing at mum’s excitement.

She explains all the components of the kitchen, even though I know my way around a kitchen already. But I hadn’t the heart to interrupt her. 

We then move on into the living room, which is in the same room as the kitchen area. I notice the room is pretty plain at the moment, but I have plenty of time to style it to my tastes. 

I see that beneath the TV, in a cabinet, my xbox 360 and sky box are hooked up to the TV. 

“This is quite cozy if you decide to bring a girl home, watch a romantic movie.” Mum tells me. “But don’t trash the place, we don’t want our money wasted.” She continues, like a typical mum. Which makes me laugh.

We continue on with the tour and they lead me down the small corridor to my bedroom.

I laugh again, when I see how they had decided to set up my room. They had placed my double bed against the corner window and stuck various pictures I had taken in the last couple of months, with the lads. As well as a couple of band posters, including my one of Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the Moon album. Whom I found ages ago, are one of Jay’s favourite band’s as well.

My parents also decided to stick lights around my bed area. Mum insisted they are decorative yet romantic.  _ Will she be setting me up with someone next? _ I think to myself when she says that.

She then shows me the spare bedroom. Which I will definitely be re-decorating. I don’t think I could see any of my mates crashing in there for the night. Seems to much of an older person’s taste. (No offence to my parent’s decorating choices of course. They have done pretty well so far.)

The apartment also includes a pretty decent sized bathroom along with a separate WC. Also some parking outside the apartment, which is handy. I’m thinking of getting a car, now that I don’t have to save for a house.

“So what do you think?” Dad asks, once we finish the tour and end up back in the sitting area.

“It’s absolutely brilliant!” I exclaim, still smiling widely. My dad takes my mum’s hand before she can say anything.

“We are glad you love it, son. Let’s leave him to settle in.” he says and pulls mum over to the door.

“We will ring you tonight, just to make sure everything is going okay.” Mum smiles at me proudly. We say our goodbyes and they leave the building, driving off back to their house. 

-

I’ve been living in my new apartment for a month now, and I have slowly been styling it to how I would like it. W hich has been easy, because there is no one here to tell me I can’t do what I want.

I have added a couple of decorations on the walls of the apartment. Quotes. But not those cringy ones that a teenage girl has beside her bed, motivational stuff. The ones I have placed are humorous, such as: “No Bitchin’ in my Kitchen” on the wall in the kitchen (obviously) and “Get Naked” beside the bathtub. Which I think is pretty hilarious. Though mum didn’t approve when she saw it for the first time. Dad just laughed, like my friends did. 

Though, when the lads came over, they managed to trash everything. Which mum wouldn’t have approved of either. Thankfully, Jase, being his slightly OCD self, stayed that evening to help rearrange everything. But, in the end, he moved everything in my apartment. Literally EVERYTHING. 

I didn’t mind too much though, he makes everything look better. 


	33. Chapter 33

Time goes quickly and soon I have lived in my apartment for several months. 

My relationship with Jase is going well. Though we still haven't established whether we are actually dating or boyfriends yet. But that's fine with me,

I'm happy just as long as we are together with or without labels. 

Also in that time, me and the lads have finished the songs that we will perform in a month's time. Though for some reason Jase hasn’t wrote one, I know him well enough now to not question him about it. He is already becoming more nervous as the day gets closer. I did ask him a while ago, when he started becoming more nervous, whether I could do anything to calm his nerves. And he told me that just having me by his side is enough to keep him composed. He also said he'd rather be behind everyone else. Which is fair enough, considering he’s quite quiet and not the person to want the spotlight on him 24/7. 

We have had a lot of fun creating these songs, Jay was able to create some upbeat dance routines to Rob’s and Gaz’s songs. My song however, he couldn’t visualise a routine as easily. Though, he had come up to me one night, when we were finalising the songs at Gary’s. 

_ “Hey How, i’ve thought of a routine for your song.” He skips over to me on the sofa, and sits as close to me as possible. _

_ “I’m listening.” I say excitedly, I didn’t think it would be very easy to choreograph an upbeat routine to my slower song. _

_ “Okay good. I was thinking of a slower interpretive dance, switch up the show a little, slow it down.” He explains, looking at me excitedly.  _

 

_ My heart stops. Me and Him. Dancing. Together. To a love song. That i’ve wrote….. About him.  _

 

_ “How?” Jay snaps his fingers in front of my face.  _

_ “Hmm?” I try act natural. _

_ “You look a little distant. Are you alright?” He asks, genuinely a bit worried. I nod vigorously.  _

_ “Where are we going to find 2 people to do the routine on the stage for us? And we have shit all money to pay them.” Jay asks, becoming a little sad. _

_ “Why would we need 2 other people?”I ask him, confused as to what he is saying. _

_ “Wait what?” He too become confused. _

_ “We are the dancers in the group. I assumed we would do it. I will be singing singing, but I do breakdancing with one hand, singing with the mic in the other hand. So it should be easy enough.” I smile at him hopefully. _

 

_ “Err, I don't know How, I'm not sure about slower dances.” He tries to make an excuse. I know he loves to do that type of dancing.“I would love to dance with you bu-” he begins to explain, but I cut him off. _

_ “But not in front of anyone.” I finish his sentence. Looking at him, questioning whether i had got my fact right. He nods. And my bright and excited expression drops. _

_ “Sorry Dougie.”  _

_ “It’s fine. Just thought it would be a nice break from the breakdancing.” I explain. I look into his eyes and I can tell he knows that I'm lying. I'm disappointed that he turned down my suggestion for the dance. I can't help taking it a little personally. _


	34. Chapter 34

We all decided now that we have the songs started and the dance routines coming on nicely, that we have to make ourselves stand out. To give us a more noticeable look when we go on stage in a month. So we thought the best idea would be to change our appearances a little. 

Gary bleached his hair blond, Mark purchased a new selection of hats, Robbie didn't want to change as his humour is already perfect. Jay decided to grow his small beard back. I decided to wear my eyebrow rings all the time, and start working a little harder on my physical appearance. (So I now go to the gym regularly.) 

 

Jase and me are going later to buy some clothes for us to wear on the occasion, but first Jase decided to get his ear pierced while we were in town less than an hour ago. Which I doubt his mum would approve of. But, he wanted to do it. 

“My mum’s going to kill me.” Jay giggles as he admires his ear piercing in my car’s reflection. 

“She's gonna want to kill me for encouraging you to get one.” I laugh, also admiring his new look. 

We were both right. Once Jason entered his house, his mum banned him from seeing me. Which to be honest, was a little childish. Considering he is old enough to move in with me, in my flat. 

So, I jump in my car as quickly as I can, and drive home. Smiling to myself, knowing that whatever his mum says, Jay will find a way to see me. 

And I am right again. I get out of my car and go round the back, to get my shopping from the boot of the car. But when I open the boot, Jason jumps out at me. 

“Shit!” I exclaim, not expecting to see him there. 

“Can I stay at yours for a couple of nights? Just until mum calms down.” He asks me. 

“Yeah of course. I did say that you are welcome any time.” I smile. And he envelops me in a massive hug, before quickly kissing me. 

“Need any help with these?” He asks. Picking up my shopping bags, before strolling off towards the apartment building. I am left absolutely speechless, my heart in my throat. A hug and kiss… That's new. I mean i’m used to him doing that, but not in public. He hates that kind of thing.

I pick up the remaining bags and lock the car before following Jay to my apartment. By the time I climb the stairs and reach my apartment, Jase has already let himself in and is sorting my groceries into the cupboards.

“Do you wanna sleep in the spare bed or mine?” I ask him, putting some of the food in the fridge. 

“Hmm. Would you like to take a guess?” He replies with a mischievous smile. 

“Mine?” I ask, pretty sure I've got the answer right. He strolls over to me and embraces me before kissing me quickly, leaving me wanting more. 

“Was that a yes?” I question, attempting to resist the temptation by gently kissing his neck. 

“Mmm, yeah.” Jase hums in between a pleased moan. I continue kissing his neck and then make my way up to his earlobe, which i nibble on. Whilst he runs his hands through my hair, quite slowly. 

“C’mon Howard, the ice creams are gonna melt.” He starts to pull away from me, remembering that the shopping is still spread out across the breakfast bar. I let him go, giggling, but immediately missing being so close to him. Ever since we went to Spain, I've felt the need to be with him 24/7, which isn't surprising as I have found out that he is completely irresistible. 

“Do you want a cuppa?” I ask, switching on the kettle and picking up the box of herbal tea Jason insisted on me buying. 

“Pleaseee” he replies in a childlike voice. Which makes me smile with amusement. 

Whilst I wait for the kettle to boil, I go to my room, making sure to tidy it up before Jase sees it. I get enough hassle about the way I arrange everything in my house, hopefully I can get this right.


	35. Chapter 35

I return to the living room to see Jay speaking to someone on my landline phone. He looks rather distressed, so I wonder what is wrong. I make our cups of tea whilst I wait for him to finish on the phone. I bring our cups over to the coffee table by the sofa. 

“Everything okay?” I ask once he puts the phone down. 

“No. That was one of your neighbours on the bottom floor. She said that a bomb has been found in the on the stairs. And that the police and bomb disposal people are on their way to sort it out. Also we are advised not to leave the building.” He explains, sitting beside me on the sofa, wearing a stressed expression. 

“So we're stuck here?” I conclude. Putting an arm around him, rubbing his shoulder to calm him. 

“Yep.” He sighs. 

“At least you're not alone.” I smile, worrying quite a bit. But I've got to stay strong for Jay. 

“Thanks How.” He lets out a little smile and picks up the remote to turn on the tv. 

We begin to watch an episode of glee that Jason previously recorded when he came round here. He told me before that his brothers teased him and laughed at him when they caught him watching it at his family home. So now he's comfortable watching it here. And to be honest, I don't mind it too much, could be worse. 

“You're tense.” I state, about halfway through the episode. Usually he is so relaxed and happy when he watches these. Especially when Kurt and Blaine have scenes together. 

“There is a bomb downstairs which could kill us. How can I be relaxed about that.” Jase replies. “Plus it's raining outside, so that doesn't make the situation any more positive.” He continues, finishing his cuppa. 

“C’mere.” I say pulling him against me, so that he is resting with his head on my chest. “Jase, everything will be fine. These things are almost always hoaxes. Plus, you're the luckiest person I know.” I soothe his worries, holding him and playing around with his hair. 

“You're too good to me.” He says thankfully, holding my free hand.


	36. Chapter 36

“I wrote a song.” He says out of nowhere. Once the episode has finished. “Can i show it to you?” He asks, lifting himself from my chest. 

“Of course! There's a guitar in the spare room if you want to use it.” I tell him and he jumps up, going to grab the guitar. 

He returns quite quickly, so I suppose that he is rather eager to show me. Which isn't like him, he usually turns down any song requests and literally never shows us anything he's working on. I wonder whether this is the song that I saw him working on ages ago at Gary's. 

He sits in front of me and starts playing some simple chords. He looks nervous but determined to perform well. 

“ _ Just the other day somebody said to me ‘Hey maybe you're slightly schizophrenic and a little out of reach, my friend’ _ .” He begins to sing. His voice is so unique and so beautiful. I recognise some of the words to this song as he sings, it's what I said to him when the lads and us went to Spain and he told me to sing it. 

“ _ How did it come to this? How did it ever come to thisss?”  _ He sings the chorus and look like he is putting all his effort into this. Which amazing to watch and listen to. 

“ _ Just the other day somebody said to me ‘Hey maybe you are oh so slightly OCD, a little out of reach, my friend,’ I said yes that's partly true but jokes aside, please stay with me, it’s just my way of compartmentalizing all the things I see. How did it come to this? How did it ever come to thissss?  _ ” He finishes the song and strums the final chords, before looking at me. 

“That was brilliant! When did you write that?” I ask, feeling super proud of his ability to create an amazing song like that. 

“In Spain, just before we got together.” He replies. “I also started another song. But I only have the chorus and the intro on the guitar.” He explains, beginning to strum the guitar again. This time, more complex and soothing tunes. “ _ Sometimes we don't know what we are waiting for, and that's the time to be the first one on the dance floor. We go from green to blue to gold to black. Breathe deep, who knows how long this will last. _ ” 

“That was beautiful.” I say purely amazed and moved by that small piece. 

“I wrote it absolutely ages ago. Y’know, when we went to Gary's to start making the tracks.” He leans the guitar against the coffee table and sits on my lap. 

“You should sing it in the show. So that the scout sees we all have singing potential.” I suggest. A talent like that shouldn't be shown to just me, the whole world should experience it. 

“Nah. My potential is in dancing.” He shrugs. “I only shew you that to take my mind off of the situation. Also I'm fed up of you pestering me to show you.” He says jokingly. 

“I feel like I'm being spoiled.” I smirk. 

“Don't go getting too big headed now.” He leans forward and rests his forehead against mine.

We sit in silence for a minute or so, just looking into each other's eyes. His are mixed interesting shades of blue, much like my own. 

“I love you.” He whispers “I hope you know that.” 

My heart flutters, but for some reason I have trouble saying it back. Though I do love him, more than anyone else. Maybe because every one of my previous relationships have gone horribly wrong after I say those three words. 

“I know.” I reply. Feeling horrible that I can't find the courage to say what he wants to hear. 

“Okay.” He sits up away from me again. An unreadable expression on his face. “I'm gonna go call Oliver, make sure that they know I'm not missing. Mum will be worrying even if she's pissed with me.” He gets off of my lap and goes over to the phone. 

As Rob would say: I need to grow a pair and tell him. If not, I may just fuck up this relationship too. Which I can't afford. Jay means too much to me. Not to mention what would happen to the band’s chances of getting noticed, if one of us were to leave because of the breakup. 


	37. Chapter 37

Whilst he is on the phone to one of his brothers, I decide to go over to him and try make it up to him for not saying it back. Though it could end badly. 

So I creep up behind him, put my hands on his hips and nuzzle into his growing mane of hair. Which smells fruity and is subtle. Whereas his cologne, which seems to be battling the sweet fruity smell, is stronger and somewhat intoxicating.  

As he talks on the phone, he stifles a little laugh at what I'm doing. I'm glad that he's not mad at me or annoyed, some people would completely go off on one, but he's calm. I listen in on the conversation between him and his twin brother Justin. He's having a go at Jase for ‘running off’ and leaving their mum worrying. I can feel that as the conversation continues, Jay is getting more concerned and feeling guilty for leaving. Even when he tells his sibling that he's safe with me (leaving the part about the bomb out of it.) So I smile mischievously to myself as I think of what I should do next. As I have my hands on his hips, I lightly caress the skin around his hipbone. Causing Jay to gasp at the unexpected action, which makes me laugh, as that is what I intended to happen. I am only more amused when I hear Justin ask Jase if ‘everything is okay’ because he heard the gasp. 

My little plan works and soon he is no longer worried about his family's reaction, knowing that they will forgive him for whatever he does. 

He puts down the phone, after the conversation is finished. Then he leans his head back into my shoulder. 

“Why'd you do that? He's suspicious now.” He says quietly, resting his hands on mine. 

“So you haven't told your family yet.” I deduce, slightly amused. 

“Nah. I told you about the whole ‘man marries wife’ thing before. Have you?” He asks. 

“Not yet. I want to, but I'm scared my mum will be pissed cus she likes you, she may get jealous.” I joke, making him laugh. Which is one of the best things. 


	38. Chapter 38

Later in the evening we received another call from the lady downstairs, who told us that the bomb was a hoax and they disposed of it. Which calmed us both and left us to enjoy what's left of the day.

So we celebrated our survival by watching a movie, having a couple of drinks and going to bed with each other.

Every time Jay stays over, he takes the mick out of my room, saying its a teen girls room. With the posters and lights strung up everywhere.

I woke up alone this morning. I hoped Jase would still be in here with me, snuggled up like during the night. But he likes to get up as early as possible, mostly because he has trouble getting to sleep. Though he did say he's finding it easier now that I've started sleeping with him, maybe it's the sense of protection.

Anyway, I wake up at about 5:50, which is unlike me. I usually wake up at 10 and roll out of bed at 1 on my days off. But, today I made sure to wake up early because I want to surprise Jase.

See, I had a dream last night and it really opened my eyes. Making me see that I shouldn't fear losing him over those 3 words.

So I put on some pants and a pair of baggy trousers before getting out of bed. My body struggling because it's not used to these early morning starts. I stretch which wakes me up a little, so I can actually walk.

I tiptoe into the kitchen/diner area, where I see the younger man (in similar baggy trousers, a pair of mine actually,) frying eggs and bacon for breakfast. I smile determinedly to myself before skipping over to him, picking him up and spinning him around. Before setting him down, back where he was and resting my chin on his shoulder, holding him tight. And before he can ask me what got me in such a good mood I say:

“I love you, and it feels fantastic.”

He moves the pan (with the bacon) off of the hot ring. Before turning around to face me. He has a surprised and amazed look.

“I've been meaning to say that since we met. Sorry it took so long.” I add, smiling proudly.

“It's only 6, are you sure you aren't just dreaming?” He questions with an amused smile.

“Nah. I'm just a 6 in the morning fool.” I laugh.

 

 


	39. Chapter 39

“Y’know what we should do.” I say whilst eating my breakfast, which is eggs and bacon that Jase cooked.

“What?” He asks, also eating his food.

“Tell our families that we are dating. They deserve to know, it's been a couple of months already.” I suggest “That reminds me, are we boyfriends or?”

“I don't think that would be a good idea, but it needs to be done.” He replies “I think we should be. If that's okay with you.” He smile happily, I too smile at the thought of us being officially together.

“It's more than okay.” I smile widely, getting my phone from my pocket before dialling my dads number. It's still early in the morning, so neither of them will have gone to work yet. It rings and I look at Jase, slightly worried, but excited.

“Howard? What's up? Why are you calling so early?” My dad asks as soon as he picks up the phone.

“Is mum with you? I've got something to tell you both.”

“Yeah she's here. I will put you on speaker. What have you got to tell us?” He asks and I put him on speaker too, so Jason can hear as well.

“Jason and I are together.” I tell them. There is a moment of silence.

“Like dating together?” He asks.

“Yep.” I reply.

“I knew it! Didn't I tell you before?” I hear my mum exclaim happily in the background.

“So you're okay with it?” I ask, making sure.

“Of course Jason's a great lad and you two get on so well that it's not surprising there is more than friendship between you.” My dad explains. I look over at Jason who has a massive smile on his face, much like mine.

“Though I think your mums a little heartbroken that you took Jay away from her.” Dad laughs.

We talk for a little while longer, before hanging up. I am so glad that they took it okay and were genuinely supportive and happy for us.

“That went brilliantly!” I exclaim.

“I hope my family react in the same way.” Jase says hopefully, dialling his mums phone.

“Hey mum, I have something I'd like to tell you.” He says.

“What is it? You haven't gone and got a girl pregnant I hope.” She replies.

“No no. Me and Howard are dating.” He tells her warily. There is another silence.

“You're gay?” She asks.

“Yeah…”

“Well to be honest, I'm not surprised. Your brother told me all about those gay bars you like to perform at.” She pauses “I still love you the same, and though I'm not too keen on Howard at the moment, I'm sure once I get to know him better, I will find that he is a nice guy.”

The two continue the conversation, Jay’s mum mainly reassuring him that everything is fine. And by the time the phone call ends, he has tears in his eyes.


	40. Chapter 40

Today is the day we perform our songs on the stage, hoping to please the talent scout. A lot of hard work has gone into this. We have all made a song to sing lead on. Other than Jason, who denies ever showing me the song he wrote. 

We currently stand backstage, waiting to go out onto the stage. We are the last act and we are all nervous. 

“You can go on now, the judges are ready” the woman on charge tells us 

“Group hug.” Gary suggests putting his arms over me and Mark. We gather in the circle. 

“Rob, don't stage dive.” He then smirks at the younger man. 

“Gaz, don't dance.” Rob laughs. 

“Mark, don't strangle yourself with your scarf.” I join in. 

“Jay, don't forget how to play the guitar.” Mark giggles. 

“How, don't dance too wildly, you're getting old now and you could injure yourself.” Jason smirks at me. 

We begin to separate from the circle. But Mark pulls us all back. 

“Put your hands in the middle” he orders, motioning for us to pile our hands onto his. 

“Takeee That!” We all exclaim, pumping ourselves up before striding onto the stage, with more confidence than we had a couple of minutes ago.

I was expecting a crowd to be watching us but there is a only panel of judges. This feels very much like the x factor. One of the judges greets us and asks us who we are, also what we will be performing for them. 

“I'm Gary, this is Howard, Robbie, Mark and Jason.” Gaz introduces us.

“And we are Take That.” We say in sync. 

“We are going to perform 4 songs: 3 originals and 1 cover.” Gary explains. 

“Good luck lads. Start when you are ready.” Another of the judges says. We take our places behind each of our microphones. The backing track starts and we begin the dance routine, before Gary starts to sing.

We perform ‘Pray’ first, all of us singing perfectly and dancing in sync. I can’t help giggling as I notice Gary trying harder than usual to keep up with the routine. He seems to notice and sings the rest of song with the most passion I have ever seen him with, he must really want this to be our best performance yet, even if it is in front of 4 people. After ‘Pray’, Mark steps in front of us and introduces the song he wrote, called ‘Babe’. Jason grabs his guitar, Mark grabs his bass, I jump onto the drums, Gary on the piano and Rob with a shaker. During the intro and the verse I don’t sing or play the drums. So I take the opportunity to look over at all my friends, whilst Mark sings he looks like he wants to be walking around the stage, singing to the judges. Gary is completely absorbed in his piano and Rob is looking overly concentrated with his shaker. Jason is doing brilliantly, playing the guitar and joining in on the harmonies with me. The song goes brilliantly and we reach my favourite part of the song, after Mark sings about the little boy at the girl’s door. It sounds like a rock song, me on my drums and Jason switching the pedal on his guitar so it’s electric rather than acoustic. I know he enjoys this bit too.

It’s now my turn to sing lead, Jason strums his guitar and I join in singing, this part is always so perfect, just the two of us. I then add a steady beat on the drums and continue singing the song. All the lads have told me that my song is beautiful and deserved to be in our 4 song impression on the judges and music scout guy. As I sing the most intense part of the song, I can’t help gazing over at Jason and smiling to myself.

As soon as the song is over, we begin our final song, which is a cover of ‘Could it be Magic’ by Barry Manilow. Rob performs the entire thing brilliantly, taking control of the entire stage, as the rest of us perform a dance routine beside him. Near the end of the song, myself and Jason perform a breakdance routine together, we were always in sync when we practiced, and this time is no different. 

We finish our set and take a small bow, not wanting to look too showy in front of the judges, but hoping to look professional.

“Well done boys. Those songs were extraordinary!” One of the judges exclaims, all of them standing on their feet, applauding. We are all amazed by the response and comments we were receiving. 


	41. Chapter 41

“Can you believe that?” Gary gasps as we leave the room.

“They loved us!” Rob exclaims, jumping up and down, before picking Mark up and spinning him around. 

Before I can join in their conversation, a man around 5ft 8 with a weirdly rectangular face, strolls up to us. We all seem to recognise him, but can’t put a name on his face. 

“Hello lads, I was observing your performance and musical talents at the back of the room just now, you may not have seen me.” the man tells us.

“Are you the one who is looking for bands to put on your record company?” Robbie asks, eagerly wanting to know.

“Yes I am. And I must say your band is the best I have seen in this entire competition.” He nods, making us all look to one another excitedly.

“Sorry, what’s your name?” Jason asks him, seemingly not trusting the man on his word.

“Simon Cowell, founder of Syco Music record company. And i’m offering you lot a record deal.” He tells us, surprised that we didn't know who he is. The five of us all look at each other with excited and amazed expressions. 

“So… What do you say?” Simon asks us, with a hopeful smile.

“Yes” Gary replies for us, with the biggest smile I have ever seen. 

“Brilliant!” Simon smiles as well, “Here’s my number, we’ll be in touch.” He then hands Gary his card before complimenting us again and leaving the room.

The door shuts and it is just us five. We silently look at each other, all of us with the same amazed expression.

“WE JUST GOT A FUCKIN RECORD DEAL!” Robbie exclaims, putting his arm over Mark and Jason, jumping up and down. Soon enough we all join him, jumping around in a circle, cheering and laughing in disbelief.

 

And from that moment on, the madness started...

**Author's Note:**

> I've been writing this for a while now, this ship is one of my favourites atm. Hope you enjoyed :)


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